Back on Track
Last night wasn't so hot. Bizarro and I tried to drown our sorrows but didn't get very far. We ended up bickering about how to best "process" the unpleasantness with the Bee-yatch, and how to purge the heavy lingering negativity. Although I was tickled to hear that she got a parking ticket (c'mon, they're only $5 anyway!), I really just want to put the whole thing behind me, keep our noses clean with the batty old landlady, and then leave an "expressive note" with the Bee-yatch upon leaving town. Bizarro had more vindictive ideas to suggest, and seemed to revel in the juiciness of "making them pay for what they've done." I of course had to argue against this, cause it doesn't solve anything, and only creates negative karma for us/him. I guess he was just blowing off steam and I was taking it all way too seriously... anyway, the evening was anythign but relaxing. We went home very early, although I stopped to pick up some beer for Bizarro so he could still drown his sorrows at home if he so chose (that makes me an enabler, I think.).
Well this morning dawned and all was well with both of us. I'm pretty much over the shock of the assoholian nature of what's-her-hole, and am now just focused on what's really important: finishing this degree and getting a job. I still plan on leaving her a note when we leave town, but I'm done feeling bad about myself. Bizarro has the first day off since the honeymoon, so he's able to get done some stuff and feel a bit more relaxed as well. The main thing is not to let the assholian behavior of others affect our wedded bliss. So be it! (or as the pagans say, "So mote it be!")
I am now off to the gym. Inspired by my husband, who is about to begin a serious period of training for Friday Night at the Men-Clobbering-Each-Other-Silly-Fest, I am going to pay for a couple of personal trainer sessions at the campus gym (the good one, not the lousy O.U. "Hot water, what's that?" one). I am bound and determined to loose the flab-you-can-grab around my midsection. Huzzah for me!
Mantra: NO MORE PASSIVE AGRESSIVENESS!
I AM NO ONE'S BITCH!
Thursday, March 31, 2005
Wednesday, March 30, 2005
Life as a married woman
The month of March is coming to a close. And what a month it's been! I turned 37, got married, began the last quarter of my graduate program, and with relief crossed off another "friend" from the "friends who make me uncomfortable" list.
Let's begin with the married thing... I love it! I love being married! I didn't expect that my feelings or inner workings would change at all, but in fact they have. There is definitely a more grounded sense of commitment and responsibility to him. I also feel that no matter what happens, we really will work through things together. Not that I ever doubted it before... just that somehow I feel even more secure, like he's got my back no matter what. For all the ramblings about marriage just being an empty institution propigated by the Christian church blah blah blah... there is in fact truth to the idea that a formal and public declaration of love and commitment solidifies the relationship on a more intimate level. It does feel like a sacred bond to me. I can see why the Catholics call marriage a 'sacrament'.
My last quarter at O.U. promises to be a good one, although I was dreading it last week while on break and on my honeymoon. I am teaching a class of Japanese students from Chubu University, as part of an exchange program O.U. has with Chubu. It's a fluency class, which means it's non-academic, very fun, and no homework is given (they have academic classes with American students that are going to blow them away). Fun and easy for me!
I'm doing another internship - this one as a supervisor to student teachers who teach in the "English for All" program. It's very practical, not to mention fantastic for the ole C.V. Best of all, I share the responsibility with another grad student. Not time consuming, not stressful at all. I love helping the teachers (undergrads for the most part, who have never taught before) - it makes me review all the teaching strategies, approaches and dilemmas I've encountered the last 2-3 years.
My only actual "class" is Teaching Reading and Writing which will be a lot of work, but which is very interesting and will be a great way to put into perspective the last 2 quarters I've spent teaching writing (although it would've been helpful to have had this class before teaching those composition classes!).
And of course... pro sem. Writing that paper takes up 5 credits of my schedule. That will be the main focus of my activity this quarter, necessarily.
And then... it'll be time to graduate! Still waiting to hear from Binghamton. Between that and the other school (community college) in NY, I'd rather work at Binghamton. Cross my fingers, say a prayer, dance a jig, light some incense... what have you.
Now as to the last bit of unpleasant business... the next to final chapter of the saga with the rich neighbor-used-to-be-friend (Bee-yatch) who's the daughter-in-law of our landlady (the old bat, or batty old landlady). The Bee-yatch has revealed her unseelie nature (inside joke that no one but me gets). Long story short - conversations and misunderstandings between our batty old land lady and us have made the Bee-yatch decide that I am a "shitty friend," and she threatened to kick us out next week! Suffice it to say that I had words with the batty old land lady last Saturday about the screen door incident (long story there not even important enough to type). I thought we'd resolved it but apparently word got back to the Bee-yatch who left a really nasty message on my voice mail last night. Since then, I have smoothed things over with the batty old landlady and completely written off the Bee-yatch for what she truly is: a stingy conservative with a drinking problem and the need for a dog to kick (me, in this case) because her family life is less than satisfactory.
With all of this in the recent past, I'm left with some crucial questions about how I need to maintain relationships in the future. This is now the THIRD friendship that has blown up because I wasn't able to meet someone else's expectations. Those expectations were either: 1. Not communicated clearly or 2. Co-dependant and unrealistic, or a combination of those two. In all three cases, I didn't feel comfortable creating boundaries and letting the other person know when I was unavailable to fulfill her expectations of what I was supposed to be/do/feel. Instead, in classic passive-agressive fashion, I would try to acquiesce and capitulate to whatever they asked of me. In many instances I was unable to follow through because I was actually over-extending myself by agreeing to their demands/expectations. This resulted in the other person feeling let down / abandoned / taken advantage of, which led to my brow-beatings (in some cases verbally abusive) and me feeling like shit about myself. I am trying very hard to understand this as a cause-and-effect scenario so that I can prevent this type of thing from happening any more.
FACT: Mean people suck, and there are lots of mean people out there. People who have all kinds of fucked up shit in their lives, who turn co-dependant and otherwise manipulative with the people around them. These people cannot be changed. The only way to deal with them is to recognize the pattern early on and make sure the boundaries are not compromised. At the same time, I need to put them in perspective and not take their meanness so personally. I was reminded last night by my friend SueBee that "All beings want to be free from suffering." When I remember this, I realize that those people with the fucked up lives are just trying to relieve their own suffering, albeit in very unhealthy ways that hurt others. Still, it reminds me that we all want the same thing, which makes people less threatening to me, and takes back the power I tend to give away so easily.
I'm sure Bizarro has lots to say about that, all in the vernacular of "ghetto" no doubt. ;-) But for me - I need a way to handle myself in these situations so that I don't get so angry and hot-headed. So for instance, the FIRST time someone jumps down my throat because I didn't fulfill an expectation she had of me, I need to immediately clarify the expectation and let it be known that a). it either wasn't clear or wasn't an appropriate expectation and b). no one gets to talk to me in a tone of voice unfit to use with a dog. The SECOND time it happens, I tell the person BYE-BYE. End of fucking story.
Now in this case it was a little trickier. The Bee-yatch knew she had us over a barrel by threatening to kick us out next week (I'm still amazed at she could be so ruthless -- she has no idea how much she embarrassed herself, revealing herself to be such a bitch). ANYWAY -- as I was saying, we had a lot to lose in this situation. I took the brow-beating by the Bee-yatch just so she'd calm the fuck down and let me handle the situation with the batty old landlady on my own. Offering to talk to the old bat and apologize seemed to mollify the Bee-yatch enough, though she still made it clear that she was "done" with it and me. (Thank gawd! She did me a big favor; now I don't have to worry about trying to placate her co-dependant, alcoholic neediness.) After that brow-beating, I expected to get another one from the old bat, who suprisingly was very gracious on the phone with me and accepted my apology without batting an eyelash (no pun intended). As Bizarro so rightly pointed out, we had to play their little game so that we'd have a place to live for the next 4-5 months. I will play this game out til the end, but I ain't leaving the state of Ohio without letting the Bee-yatch know what I think of her "generosity" (she spent 3/4 of our conversation reminding me of how grateful I should be to her and her family).
So where does all that leave me? It leaves me wanting to be more adept with setting and keeping boundaries with people. Being honest with people - right attitude. Even if that person really really wants me to do something for them, I will only agree to it if I know I can do it and do it with right attitude (in other words, not pissing and moaning the whole time because I have more important things to do). Furthermore, I will not let people speak to me in a tone of voice that is unfit for a pet tarantula. If they do, I'll simply let them know that I can't talk to them until they calm down and can speak reasonably about the situation. I realize that some situations, involving bosses and landlords, for instance, require kid gloves. But inside that kid glove will be an iron hand, holding up the boundaries and keeping things in perspective. Many times I have heard and read Buddhist teachings that warn against "idiot compassion." In my case this applies to how I meet the needs of other people in my life. To put it more crudely: just cause they need doesn't mean I put out!! A big clue to all of this is for me to learn how not to take everything so personally. In other words, just because someone doesn't like me or something I'm doing doesn't mean that it's TRUE, and certainly doesn't mean that I am any less of a person than they are. Maybe that fact is obvious to other people, but for me it's a pretty big lesson to internalize.
That's enough psycho-babble for now. I have a counseling session scheduled for tomorrow, and none too soon. Hmmmm...wonder what I'll talk about....
The month of March is coming to a close. And what a month it's been! I turned 37, got married, began the last quarter of my graduate program, and with relief crossed off another "friend" from the "friends who make me uncomfortable" list.
Let's begin with the married thing... I love it! I love being married! I didn't expect that my feelings or inner workings would change at all, but in fact they have. There is definitely a more grounded sense of commitment and responsibility to him. I also feel that no matter what happens, we really will work through things together. Not that I ever doubted it before... just that somehow I feel even more secure, like he's got my back no matter what. For all the ramblings about marriage just being an empty institution propigated by the Christian church blah blah blah... there is in fact truth to the idea that a formal and public declaration of love and commitment solidifies the relationship on a more intimate level. It does feel like a sacred bond to me. I can see why the Catholics call marriage a 'sacrament'.
My last quarter at O.U. promises to be a good one, although I was dreading it last week while on break and on my honeymoon. I am teaching a class of Japanese students from Chubu University, as part of an exchange program O.U. has with Chubu. It's a fluency class, which means it's non-academic, very fun, and no homework is given (they have academic classes with American students that are going to blow them away). Fun and easy for me!
I'm doing another internship - this one as a supervisor to student teachers who teach in the "English for All" program. It's very practical, not to mention fantastic for the ole C.V. Best of all, I share the responsibility with another grad student. Not time consuming, not stressful at all. I love helping the teachers (undergrads for the most part, who have never taught before) - it makes me review all the teaching strategies, approaches and dilemmas I've encountered the last 2-3 years.
My only actual "class" is Teaching Reading and Writing which will be a lot of work, but which is very interesting and will be a great way to put into perspective the last 2 quarters I've spent teaching writing (although it would've been helpful to have had this class before teaching those composition classes!).
And of course... pro sem. Writing that paper takes up 5 credits of my schedule. That will be the main focus of my activity this quarter, necessarily.
And then... it'll be time to graduate! Still waiting to hear from Binghamton. Between that and the other school (community college) in NY, I'd rather work at Binghamton. Cross my fingers, say a prayer, dance a jig, light some incense... what have you.
Now as to the last bit of unpleasant business... the next to final chapter of the saga with the rich neighbor-used-to-be-friend (Bee-yatch) who's the daughter-in-law of our landlady (the old bat, or batty old landlady). The Bee-yatch has revealed her unseelie nature (inside joke that no one but me gets). Long story short - conversations and misunderstandings between our batty old land lady and us have made the Bee-yatch decide that I am a "shitty friend," and she threatened to kick us out next week! Suffice it to say that I had words with the batty old land lady last Saturday about the screen door incident (long story there not even important enough to type). I thought we'd resolved it but apparently word got back to the Bee-yatch who left a really nasty message on my voice mail last night. Since then, I have smoothed things over with the batty old landlady and completely written off the Bee-yatch for what she truly is: a stingy conservative with a drinking problem and the need for a dog to kick (me, in this case) because her family life is less than satisfactory.
With all of this in the recent past, I'm left with some crucial questions about how I need to maintain relationships in the future. This is now the THIRD friendship that has blown up because I wasn't able to meet someone else's expectations. Those expectations were either: 1. Not communicated clearly or 2. Co-dependant and unrealistic, or a combination of those two. In all three cases, I didn't feel comfortable creating boundaries and letting the other person know when I was unavailable to fulfill her expectations of what I was supposed to be/do/feel. Instead, in classic passive-agressive fashion, I would try to acquiesce and capitulate to whatever they asked of me. In many instances I was unable to follow through because I was actually over-extending myself by agreeing to their demands/expectations. This resulted in the other person feeling let down / abandoned / taken advantage of, which led to my brow-beatings (in some cases verbally abusive) and me feeling like shit about myself. I am trying very hard to understand this as a cause-and-effect scenario so that I can prevent this type of thing from happening any more.
FACT: Mean people suck, and there are lots of mean people out there. People who have all kinds of fucked up shit in their lives, who turn co-dependant and otherwise manipulative with the people around them. These people cannot be changed. The only way to deal with them is to recognize the pattern early on and make sure the boundaries are not compromised. At the same time, I need to put them in perspective and not take their meanness so personally. I was reminded last night by my friend SueBee that "All beings want to be free from suffering." When I remember this, I realize that those people with the fucked up lives are just trying to relieve their own suffering, albeit in very unhealthy ways that hurt others. Still, it reminds me that we all want the same thing, which makes people less threatening to me, and takes back the power I tend to give away so easily.
I'm sure Bizarro has lots to say about that, all in the vernacular of "ghetto" no doubt. ;-) But for me - I need a way to handle myself in these situations so that I don't get so angry and hot-headed. So for instance, the FIRST time someone jumps down my throat because I didn't fulfill an expectation she had of me, I need to immediately clarify the expectation and let it be known that a). it either wasn't clear or wasn't an appropriate expectation and b). no one gets to talk to me in a tone of voice unfit to use with a dog. The SECOND time it happens, I tell the person BYE-BYE. End of fucking story.
Now in this case it was a little trickier. The Bee-yatch knew she had us over a barrel by threatening to kick us out next week (I'm still amazed at she could be so ruthless -- she has no idea how much she embarrassed herself, revealing herself to be such a bitch). ANYWAY -- as I was saying, we had a lot to lose in this situation. I took the brow-beating by the Bee-yatch just so she'd calm the fuck down and let me handle the situation with the batty old landlady on my own. Offering to talk to the old bat and apologize seemed to mollify the Bee-yatch enough, though she still made it clear that she was "done" with it and me. (Thank gawd! She did me a big favor; now I don't have to worry about trying to placate her co-dependant, alcoholic neediness.) After that brow-beating, I expected to get another one from the old bat, who suprisingly was very gracious on the phone with me and accepted my apology without batting an eyelash (no pun intended). As Bizarro so rightly pointed out, we had to play their little game so that we'd have a place to live for the next 4-5 months. I will play this game out til the end, but I ain't leaving the state of Ohio without letting the Bee-yatch know what I think of her "generosity" (she spent 3/4 of our conversation reminding me of how grateful I should be to her and her family).
So where does all that leave me? It leaves me wanting to be more adept with setting and keeping boundaries with people. Being honest with people - right attitude. Even if that person really really wants me to do something for them, I will only agree to it if I know I can do it and do it with right attitude (in other words, not pissing and moaning the whole time because I have more important things to do). Furthermore, I will not let people speak to me in a tone of voice that is unfit for a pet tarantula. If they do, I'll simply let them know that I can't talk to them until they calm down and can speak reasonably about the situation. I realize that some situations, involving bosses and landlords, for instance, require kid gloves. But inside that kid glove will be an iron hand, holding up the boundaries and keeping things in perspective. Many times I have heard and read Buddhist teachings that warn against "idiot compassion." In my case this applies to how I meet the needs of other people in my life. To put it more crudely: just cause they need doesn't mean I put out!! A big clue to all of this is for me to learn how not to take everything so personally. In other words, just because someone doesn't like me or something I'm doing doesn't mean that it's TRUE, and certainly doesn't mean that I am any less of a person than they are. Maybe that fact is obvious to other people, but for me it's a pretty big lesson to internalize.
That's enough psycho-babble for now. I have a counseling session scheduled for tomorrow, and none too soon. Hmmmm...wonder what I'll talk about....
Friday, March 18, 2005
Feeling Accomplished
It's a glorious Friday. I have finished all my work for the quarter and am burning the DVD of my teaching demo as I write this. I can send out my latest round of application materials tomorrow. It feels good! Now I can focus on other, more fun things... like going to Cleveland to see Mr and Mrs Bizarro tomorrow night and then... getting married next Wednesday!
Tonight we're going to see "Ring 2" with Mr Club and the Kitten. I'm looking forward to it. I still prefer the Japanese "Ringu" to the American remake ("The Ring"), mostly due to the fact that the storytelling pace, the character movements and the ending all made for better psychological horror than the American "in your face - this is a horror movie!" version. There are a couple things I liked better in The Ring, such as the more explicit explanation that Samara had the ability to psycically project images onto film / photosensitive material. This made the "ghost on a videotape" idea more plausible. Ringu didn't really touch that concept, it just expected the audience to suspend disbelief.
Mr Club prefers The Ring to the Japanese original - again, he saw them in that order, and I saw Ringu first ( the order seems to have an impact on which movie people prefer). Something I think that Ringu achieves infinitely better than The Ring is holding onto the mystery of Sadako, keeping her image and her story haunting and indistinct, whereas The Ring immediately shows us Samara's face, humanizing her from nearly the beginning with loads of family history and drama. It makes her more like another Damien, rather than this mysterious and terrifying force that is other-worldly and not really human anymore. Furthermore, Ringu relied on the actor's movement and simple camera tricks to give Sadako that "non-human" appearance. Very, very creepy! The lighting and make-up effects were higher quality in The Ring, but I'm not convinced they were really that useful in creating a better story. Furthermore, The Ring's director threw in these cheesy Hitchcock visual references that distracted from the story (the stairwell ripped off from "Vertigo" and the main character looking into her neighbors' windows, one of whom is in a wheel chair a la "Rear Window").
But having said all that, The Ring 2 was directed by Nakata Hideo, who directed Ringu. From the tiny things I've read about it, he's bringing back that pacing, and the more suggestive rather than hit-you-over-the-head images from Ringu (such as the bodies of Sadako/Samara's victims frozen in poses of horror rather than made to look like 30-year-old drowning victims). I'm psyched!!!
On a similar note, last night Bizarro and I watched "Ju-On" which he insisted on seeing before we watch "The Grudge". Ju-On was directed by Takashi Shimizu, young up and coming J-horror director. The film was clearly inspired by images from Ringu - particularly the way the mother's ghost crawls Kabuki-style down the steps toward her intended victims, looking more like a spider crab than a dead woman. Anyway, the story line was extremely non-existant. What it DID have was back-story, which was revealed in bits and pieces. But overall the killings seemed at times to be random, and the "roles" that the victims played didn't seem consistent - just that whomever had anything to do with the haunted house (even by calling the answering machine!) was a goner (except the security guard - not sure why he died - he never went near the house although he was with one of the people who had been in the house). See what I mean?
Anyway, the funny thing about Ju-On was the commentary by none other than master horror and larf maker Sam Raimi, accompanied by the ass-licking "yeah, just like in Evil Dead" Scott Spiegel. Those two guys barely talked about Ju-On except to express moments of creepiness. Ah well, watching the commentary after the movie allowed me to sober up after drinking almost 3/4 of a bottle of wine by myself!
We began the evening by watching "American Adobo" which I won't write about here because I'm sure Bizarro has written his ... er.. review on his blog by now.
Here's to a fantastic spring break! The best of my life, I think!
It's a glorious Friday. I have finished all my work for the quarter and am burning the DVD of my teaching demo as I write this. I can send out my latest round of application materials tomorrow. It feels good! Now I can focus on other, more fun things... like going to Cleveland to see Mr and Mrs Bizarro tomorrow night and then... getting married next Wednesday!
Tonight we're going to see "Ring 2" with Mr Club and the Kitten. I'm looking forward to it. I still prefer the Japanese "Ringu" to the American remake ("The Ring"), mostly due to the fact that the storytelling pace, the character movements and the ending all made for better psychological horror than the American "in your face - this is a horror movie!" version. There are a couple things I liked better in The Ring, such as the more explicit explanation that Samara had the ability to psycically project images onto film / photosensitive material. This made the "ghost on a videotape" idea more plausible. Ringu didn't really touch that concept, it just expected the audience to suspend disbelief.
Mr Club prefers The Ring to the Japanese original - again, he saw them in that order, and I saw Ringu first ( the order seems to have an impact on which movie people prefer). Something I think that Ringu achieves infinitely better than The Ring is holding onto the mystery of Sadako, keeping her image and her story haunting and indistinct, whereas The Ring immediately shows us Samara's face, humanizing her from nearly the beginning with loads of family history and drama. It makes her more like another Damien, rather than this mysterious and terrifying force that is other-worldly and not really human anymore. Furthermore, Ringu relied on the actor's movement and simple camera tricks to give Sadako that "non-human" appearance. Very, very creepy! The lighting and make-up effects were higher quality in The Ring, but I'm not convinced they were really that useful in creating a better story. Furthermore, The Ring's director threw in these cheesy Hitchcock visual references that distracted from the story (the stairwell ripped off from "Vertigo" and the main character looking into her neighbors' windows, one of whom is in a wheel chair a la "Rear Window").
But having said all that, The Ring 2 was directed by Nakata Hideo, who directed Ringu. From the tiny things I've read about it, he's bringing back that pacing, and the more suggestive rather than hit-you-over-the-head images from Ringu (such as the bodies of Sadako/Samara's victims frozen in poses of horror rather than made to look like 30-year-old drowning victims). I'm psyched!!!
On a similar note, last night Bizarro and I watched "Ju-On" which he insisted on seeing before we watch "The Grudge". Ju-On was directed by Takashi Shimizu, young up and coming J-horror director. The film was clearly inspired by images from Ringu - particularly the way the mother's ghost crawls Kabuki-style down the steps toward her intended victims, looking more like a spider crab than a dead woman. Anyway, the story line was extremely non-existant. What it DID have was back-story, which was revealed in bits and pieces. But overall the killings seemed at times to be random, and the "roles" that the victims played didn't seem consistent - just that whomever had anything to do with the haunted house (even by calling the answering machine!) was a goner (except the security guard - not sure why he died - he never went near the house although he was with one of the people who had been in the house). See what I mean?
Anyway, the funny thing about Ju-On was the commentary by none other than master horror and larf maker Sam Raimi, accompanied by the ass-licking "yeah, just like in Evil Dead" Scott Spiegel. Those two guys barely talked about Ju-On except to express moments of creepiness. Ah well, watching the commentary after the movie allowed me to sober up after drinking almost 3/4 of a bottle of wine by myself!
We began the evening by watching "American Adobo" which I won't write about here because I'm sure Bizarro has written his ... er.. review on his blog by now.
Here's to a fantastic spring break! The best of my life, I think!
Tuesday, March 15, 2005
Rimmerrrr, Ri-i-i-mmerrr...
...to quote my favorite anti-hero from Red Dwarf. Yes, I feel as if I've "won". The quarter is over and I just have to finish my grading and then turn in the student grades on Thursday.
The last 24 hours have been remarkable. But wait... set the Way-Back Machine to last Friday, March 11. I received an email from the Associate Director of OPIE, where I'm a T.A., stating that a particular SUNY university is looking for an ESL instructor. Furthermore, on the QT, there's an OU insider on the hiring committee. So without ado I emailed a cover, CV and references that very afternoon.
Yesterday, which was Monday, I was sitting at my computer getting ready to contact another university in Upstate, when I got a call from the dirctor of the ESL program at the SUNY university herself! She said the committee was impressed with me and wanted to see a video of my teaching, as well as some lesson plans, syllabi, etc. VIDEO? "Er, um... I don't have one. But I'll think of something, no problem. yes, of course I can send you something by the 29th. I'm meeting with my students one last time tomorrow..."
At which point I ran downstairs to my mentor in OPIE and asked her if it would be appropriate to teach a "mini lesson" with my students on Tuesday, and videotape it. She said NO. No, as in, no you can't do that it's not appropriate. Not sure why, it wasn't explained to me. BUT being the resourceful, determined, job-hungry grad student that I am, I came up with a solution.
I was going to give the students a final "quiz" on the last chapter of the book we've been working on for the last 2 weeks. So I created a group activity as part of the "quiz" so that I would be interacting with students and demonstrating the kind of approach and activities I talk about in my statement of philosophy (which the folks at SUNY also want to see). So yesterday afternoon, I had to re-think and re-make my quiz, arrange for a camera and a different room to accomodate the camera, find a camera person, etc.
It would seem that everything went off well. however I have yet to edit the tape, which I'll be doing hopefully Thursday and Friday of this week with the generous help of the technology dude in OPIE. Im going to burn a DVD with not only the 10 minutes or so of video, but also the other documents the hiring committee has requested.
Can you believe it? All in 24 hours. To quote a song "What a difference a day makes!".
Indeed!
I'm going to my favorite coffee shop in town (NOT Landru's) to grade my students' work, then I have to pick up Bizarro at the Diamond Mines at 7:00. He has club tonight, which means he'll come home covered in bruises and everyone at his work will think I'm a husband abuser. Ha. Seriously, though, I hope he doesn't hurt himself. I understand the stated purpose of conditioning, but it seems to me that it might be more beneficial, mentally and spiritually, if it happens naturally from daily training, rather than a "Tuesday/Thursday night let's-bash-up-my-forearms-as-much-as-possible" session.
Just my idea.
I'm getting married in 8 days. Oh. My. God.
...to quote my favorite anti-hero from Red Dwarf. Yes, I feel as if I've "won". The quarter is over and I just have to finish my grading and then turn in the student grades on Thursday.
The last 24 hours have been remarkable. But wait... set the Way-Back Machine to last Friday, March 11. I received an email from the Associate Director of OPIE, where I'm a T.A., stating that a particular SUNY university is looking for an ESL instructor. Furthermore, on the QT, there's an OU insider on the hiring committee. So without ado I emailed a cover, CV and references that very afternoon.
Yesterday, which was Monday, I was sitting at my computer getting ready to contact another university in Upstate, when I got a call from the dirctor of the ESL program at the SUNY university herself! She said the committee was impressed with me and wanted to see a video of my teaching, as well as some lesson plans, syllabi, etc. VIDEO? "Er, um... I don't have one. But I'll think of something, no problem. yes, of course I can send you something by the 29th. I'm meeting with my students one last time tomorrow..."
At which point I ran downstairs to my mentor in OPIE and asked her if it would be appropriate to teach a "mini lesson" with my students on Tuesday, and videotape it. She said NO. No, as in, no you can't do that it's not appropriate. Not sure why, it wasn't explained to me. BUT being the resourceful, determined, job-hungry grad student that I am, I came up with a solution.
I was going to give the students a final "quiz" on the last chapter of the book we've been working on for the last 2 weeks. So I created a group activity as part of the "quiz" so that I would be interacting with students and demonstrating the kind of approach and activities I talk about in my statement of philosophy (which the folks at SUNY also want to see). So yesterday afternoon, I had to re-think and re-make my quiz, arrange for a camera and a different room to accomodate the camera, find a camera person, etc.
It would seem that everything went off well. however I have yet to edit the tape, which I'll be doing hopefully Thursday and Friday of this week with the generous help of the technology dude in OPIE. Im going to burn a DVD with not only the 10 minutes or so of video, but also the other documents the hiring committee has requested.
Can you believe it? All in 24 hours. To quote a song "What a difference a day makes!".
Indeed!
I'm going to my favorite coffee shop in town (NOT Landru's) to grade my students' work, then I have to pick up Bizarro at the Diamond Mines at 7:00. He has club tonight, which means he'll come home covered in bruises and everyone at his work will think I'm a husband abuser. Ha. Seriously, though, I hope he doesn't hurt himself. I understand the stated purpose of conditioning, but it seems to me that it might be more beneficial, mentally and spiritually, if it happens naturally from daily training, rather than a "Tuesday/Thursday night let's-bash-up-my-forearms-as-much-as-possible" session.
Just my idea.
I'm getting married in 8 days. Oh. My. God.
Tuesday, March 08, 2005
It's Bloggin' Time
I've been a bad blogger. I admit it. I'm sorry. LIKE ANYONE CARES.
Well anyway, so it's the 8th of March, which means I'm 37 years and 5 days old. I had a fantastic birthday despite the fact that the week itself wasn't very cheery. On the day of, my colleagues from the LSOU (Linguistics Society of Ohio University), of which I am co-president, met up at Casa, and we had a very productive meeting. After the meeting (over pitchers of Scotch Ale and lots of nachos), we slipped right into birthday mode. My girls brought in a cake and the bartender helped them light the candles (no, they didn't fit 37 candles on the cake!). My office mate bought me a shot of Jameson's (my fave) and I continued to drink Nutbrown Ale through out the night. After most of our friends left, Bizarro and I stayed and watched the karaoke with glee. Yes, Bizarro got up and belted one out - not sure if he's told that story on his blog or if he wants it generally known, but he can really deliver "Frank-n-furter style" when the occasion calls for it!
The weekend was even better - in Columbus for the whole weekend, hanging out with my matron of honor and her kids. They also brought out a birthday cake (again, not with 37 candles). The best part of the night was -- kk -- our little stop-motion Power Rangers porno. It all started with the fully-articulated 12 inch Black and White power rangers... and ended up... well.. if they send us the photos we'll post them. Freaking hilarious! And we hadn't had anything to drink, even.
This week is the last week of the quarter. Praise be!! I gave my crappy little presentation in CALL yesterday - oh my gawd. I really have a love-hate relationship with technology. It would seem that I try to love it but it hates me. Anyway, the presentation and accompanying paper are now behind me. All I have left is the internship - which requires lots of scanning and uploading docs and PDFs onto a Moodle site which I've helped to create for this project. The problem lies in the fact that my supervisor doesn't know squat about the Moodle or the related technology issues. So I've basically been mired in trial-and-error, with more error than anything else. But finally, after this morning's session, I think I've figured out what I need to efficiently scan, save and upload. The worst part is - uploading all these files isn't even making the best use of the Moodle site. There are all sorts of resources we could be making but for the time being we're just dumping all this other stuff up there. Well it's a work in progress, and likely will be so for some time to come. Anyway, after this Friday it's no longer any of my concern.
I am anxious to get through this week so that I can focus on getting married. Not just the physical components, the preparations, etc. but what it means to be getting married. I'd like to take a couple days - maybe this weekend - and have a kind of retreat. Maybe do that cleansing fast for 3 days. Although I do have to collect and grade my students' final research papers next week, but that wont be bad because they've been writing in drafts. Anyway, I really need to take some time for myself before the wedding to get into the headspace of what I'm about to embark upon. Namely - the rest of my life.
And with that, I need to eat and get back to my scanning and uploading tasks.
Groove is in the heart.
I've been a bad blogger. I admit it. I'm sorry. LIKE ANYONE CARES.
Well anyway, so it's the 8th of March, which means I'm 37 years and 5 days old. I had a fantastic birthday despite the fact that the week itself wasn't very cheery. On the day of, my colleagues from the LSOU (Linguistics Society of Ohio University), of which I am co-president, met up at Casa, and we had a very productive meeting. After the meeting (over pitchers of Scotch Ale and lots of nachos), we slipped right into birthday mode. My girls brought in a cake and the bartender helped them light the candles (no, they didn't fit 37 candles on the cake!). My office mate bought me a shot of Jameson's (my fave) and I continued to drink Nutbrown Ale through out the night. After most of our friends left, Bizarro and I stayed and watched the karaoke with glee. Yes, Bizarro got up and belted one out - not sure if he's told that story on his blog or if he wants it generally known, but he can really deliver "Frank-n-furter style" when the occasion calls for it!
The weekend was even better - in Columbus for the whole weekend, hanging out with my matron of honor and her kids. They also brought out a birthday cake (again, not with 37 candles). The best part of the night was -- kk -- our little stop-motion Power Rangers porno. It all started with the fully-articulated 12 inch Black and White power rangers... and ended up... well.. if they send us the photos we'll post them. Freaking hilarious! And we hadn't had anything to drink, even.
This week is the last week of the quarter. Praise be!! I gave my crappy little presentation in CALL yesterday - oh my gawd. I really have a love-hate relationship with technology. It would seem that I try to love it but it hates me. Anyway, the presentation and accompanying paper are now behind me. All I have left is the internship - which requires lots of scanning and uploading docs and PDFs onto a Moodle site which I've helped to create for this project. The problem lies in the fact that my supervisor doesn't know squat about the Moodle or the related technology issues. So I've basically been mired in trial-and-error, with more error than anything else. But finally, after this morning's session, I think I've figured out what I need to efficiently scan, save and upload. The worst part is - uploading all these files isn't even making the best use of the Moodle site. There are all sorts of resources we could be making but for the time being we're just dumping all this other stuff up there. Well it's a work in progress, and likely will be so for some time to come. Anyway, after this Friday it's no longer any of my concern.
I am anxious to get through this week so that I can focus on getting married. Not just the physical components, the preparations, etc. but what it means to be getting married. I'd like to take a couple days - maybe this weekend - and have a kind of retreat. Maybe do that cleansing fast for 3 days. Although I do have to collect and grade my students' final research papers next week, but that wont be bad because they've been writing in drafts. Anyway, I really need to take some time for myself before the wedding to get into the headspace of what I'm about to embark upon. Namely - the rest of my life.
And with that, I need to eat and get back to my scanning and uploading tasks.
Groove is in the heart.
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