The Year Bizarro Saved Thanksgiving

This year's T'giving was a struggle, gentle readers. The week began with the usual B.S. at the chorch, me racing around cleaning house for my Bro and his Wife to arrive on Tuesday night, and also squeezing in an overdue haircut.

Got all that done, Bro and his Wife arrived Tuesday evening and we had a good visit with Mom. Stopped at the wine store on the way home, got back in the car and somehow (in some fashion that only I could manage) I brushed the lights/turn signal stalk on the steering wheel in such a way as to snap the fucker right off. Yep. No lights, no turn signals. Just an empty space where the arm should have been. It was the most aggravating thing to have happen the night before a 6-hour drive to Cleveland. I was sobbing, really ready to put my fist through the windshield. My brother did his best to somehow rig the thing so that I could at least turn on the lights, but no dice. Thankfully, the booze store is only a minute's drive though a parking lot and a relatively back road to my apartment. We got it back home with the flashers on, and my Bro had to disconnect the battery so the parking lights (which were stuck ON) wouldn't drain it overnight.

We proceeded to open the bottle of wine and try to make due with each other's company and that was actually more enjoyable than I would have imagined. Bizarro was wonderful - he came up with the plan to deliver the car to the dealership in the morning and then rent a car. I got on the horn first thing the next day and found a place that rents used cars (nice ones, though, not beaters like mine) so that we could drive to Cleveland. I bagged work for the morning and my Bro carted us to where we needed to go. We then took him and the Wife to our favorite greasy spoon for a historic diner experience.

The trip to Cleveland was actually more enjoyable in the rental, and we decided that until we get a better car, we'll rent any time we have to make a long trip. It was decidedly more comfortable, and the power of a V6 engine was wonderful going up and down the hills of our City on the Edge of Forever.

Of course I spent most of my time in Cleveland sick, but I pushed through and did some shopping and even made my first ever skateboard ride! Yes, Bizarro's sister took me to the skatepark and let me borrow her fab longboard. It was fun! Also, on T'giving Day, I sat on my butt and watched much of the House M.D. marathon on USA.


We took our time coming back today. My Bro and the Wife left our apartment (where they stayed to spend T'giving with mom) in better condition than when we left.

Speaking of Mom, though, things aren't looking as promising as a week ago. She's had a sharp pain in her hip these last few days which has really set her back. I really don't know what's going to happen. I have a feeling we'll be moving her into a permanent nursing home arrangement - but it WON'T be the place she is now. It's the usual horror story there and I won't subject Mom to that. But we haven't given up hope yet. The fact is that she's supposed to be in Rehab, even though her bed's on the nursing home floor, so if we can get her actually MOVED to the Rehab floor, she may do better with the attention she needs. For one thing they're not having her walking every day, which is fucking ludicrious. What do they think she's going to have to do when she goes back to the assisted living facility? Anyway, the saga continues to drag on and I am back to feeling like shit about the situation. Poor Mom. She's very discouraged and worried, and she's in a helluva lot of pain with the nursing staff not giving her the pain meds like she's supposed to be getting. I'm really ready to break my foot off in someone's ass over there. Believe me, they have no idea how much of a squeaky wheel I can be.

I gotta dump the church job sooner than the 12th. I need to be 100% engaged with Mom and this situation. I'm supposed to be training someone starting Monday, which means I won't be able to break away for the usual barrage of phone calls I deal with every day dealing with Mom.

So I've got one day before going back to work, so I can spend some Q-time with Mom, do some laundry, and write up lists of all the stuff I have to attend to. Welcome back. At least I did have a break, though, thanks to Bizarro, who was able to problem solve us out of a sticky situation, and who did the first lap of driving both ways, as well as all the driving while we were there. He's a keeper, that one.

Okay, after the last 3 image entries, I'll actually write something.

Well, first off is good news. The Rehab folks think Mom is doing so well that she'll be discharged from rehab on Dec. 1 or thereabouts. This is far better than we could have expected. It also means I have to kick things into high gear early next week to get home health aides in the picture.

I only have 2.5 more weeks at the Chorch, and I'm counting down the seconds. I love my co-workers, but I need a break from this break-neck schedule. With the extra class at the community college next semester, I will be just busy enough, leaving time for handing Mom-stuff and keeping some energy set aside for writing and hopefully getting published and moving forward in '09 with getting an agent. That was a goal for '08 that disappeared when things got bad with Mom's health.

Next week is of course "gorge yourself on rich foods and then sit on your ass for 4 days" week. My Bro is coming on Tuesday the 25th, we are leaving for Cleveland on the 26th and returning Saturday the 29th. I am looking forward to a change of scenery and being pampered a little bit. Not that I should feel good about my 70-something mother-in-law cooking for me, but there is no way to stop her. Although, she does let me help for Thanksgiving dinner, at least. But the rest of the time she insists on feeding us like were were children totally dependent on her. Which is exactly how she likes it. But I know that feeding us is how she shows her love. And actually, Dad is the same way. He cooks, too. Especially breakfast, which is Bizarro's favorite part - bacon, sausage and eggs EVERY MORNING.

Over all right now I'm feeling okay and the stress levels are the lowest they've been in weeks. I am going out tonight to meet a friend of mine, Kyle, from grad school (linguistics) who is currently doing his PhD here at the School on the Hill. Bizarro ran into him randomly at a Starfucks a couple months ago, and this is the first chance we've had to get together and shoot the shit. It's so comforting when people from the past re-enter your life at random moments. Particularly someone who knows some of your history and shares some of the same professional/academic experiences. It'll be grand to have another friend in The City on The Edge of Forever.

Next week I'm going back to Yoga class, which will kick my ass again since it's been 3 weeks since I was there last. I've done some at home but not as regularly as I'd have liked, between being sick and coming home exhausted at 8 p.m. every night from the hospital or nursing home.

One last thing to add - I'm officially addicted to watching "House, M.D." Hugh Laurie is intense and I would totally do him. Not as House, you understand, but in a general way.

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Workin' It!

Hot damn! Just got an email from the local community college - I'd sent a C.V. to the woman coordinating their newly minted screenwriting track and she's offering me a 1-credit section to teach next semester! Fantastic! Since it's run through the English department, she's also asking if I want to teach comp. classes. However, next semester I'll have my hands full with 3 screenwriting classes, so perhaps the comp classes can wait until next year (esp. if I don't get the gig I have this year at the Other School On the Hill).

It's great to see hard work and patience pay off. I am SO PSYCHED! Thank you, Universe!

Winter Onset

It snowed last night. Supposed to snow all day. And night. And tomorrow. And the next day. And the next. We're talking light dusting at this point. But it's definitely Winter coming around the corner. I love how it's technically still "Autumn" until Dec. 21st. Maybe in the lands of the Celts, but here in Upstate New York it is freaking Winter on our back doorstep, and he's about to dominate.

Mom update: She's being moved to the rehabilitation center tomorrow afternoon. I had arranged to take off work to help her with the SSI interview at 11 a.m. but now I have to extend that time off so I can help get her to the rehab place. My boss will just have to deal. I'm out of sick and vaca time, though, so at this point the time is eating into my paycheck, which sux. Oh well - not that worried. I am here to help Mom and that's the main thing.

I wrote a short script this past weekend. Based on a true story that my brother's first wife told me over drinks when we went out a few weeks ago in Boston. I also slogged through edits on my sci fi. I've come to the conclusion that I need a writing group. I've seen first hand in the class I teach this semester that having writing partners and group critique is essential for some people, and I think I may be one of them. So here's to finding some like-minded souls in this tiny corner of Frigidaria.

Time to get ready for work at the Chorch.

Barrel Man

Recently I wrote a note on Annietown about how I love Tiki (as my few but faithful readers know), even though I realize that Tiki mugs are white people's bastardization of an ancient culture.

So without further ado, and to even the score, I present you with the Barrel Man. This fine example of Filipino culture is kitch and hilarious, but at the same time embarrassing for the 2nd generation Filipino who has to explain its presence to his white friends. And as Bizarro will tell ye, only the "bakya crowd" (Filipino hill billies) pander in the Barrel Man. This, according to Mrs. Mom Bizarro.





Images from Wikipedia

A quick update while I'm at work.

Mom seems to be doing better. It was a terrible time with every doctor proposing a different theory of what was wrong with her and why she kept falling. Finally the verdict has come in: overmedication (they took 3 of them away and she's done much better since) and an issue of oxygen sensitivity. Right now she's waiting until a bed opens up at the best rehab center in the area, and then the doc also wants to do a sleep study and some other tests related to her breathing. We are hopeful that rehab will help her get back on her feet so that she can return to the adult home with additional home health aides to assist her.

I am handling things much better than a few days ago, though I ended up getting sick in the middle of things (thanks to Bizarro) so it made me edgier and yesterday I was unable to visit her. I'm feeling better today, though, and hope to see her this evening after work. I'm still tired and need to get a lot of rest to make sure I don't relapse (I've heard the relapse with this virus is worse than the initial infection).

I have other things to tell but this is it for now while I'm at work. Thank you to everyone who has shown their love and support, and who has offered prayers and good thoughts on our behalf.

It's been an awful week and I need to take a few moments to journal about it. This is the entry that's about me keeping my sanity by ranting.

We moved Mom up to the AL place on Monday, and then between Tuesday morning and Wednesday night she'd fallen 4 times. Wed evening I went out to meet the local windsurfing club (which was awesome and I loved meeting those folks). I walked in the door at home and literally within 10 seconds it was the AL aide on the phone calling to tell me Mom had fallen and hit her head, and the EMTs were coming to take her to the ER.

I absolutely and totally freaked out, screaming and crying and wailing, then I pulled myself together to drive over there. Meanwhile, Bizarro has come down with a nasty cold and fever, so he was in no condition to come with me. Luckily, PMP was around and she met me at the ER. It was a long night - Mom ended up with no major injuries from the fall, miraculously, but they finally decided to admit her at 4 a.m. I don't know why it took them all fucking night to do this but it did.

So she's in the hospital, feeling and looking a bit better, and it's been determined that she needs rehab and PT to get her strength back before trying to send her back to Longview. That was as I'd expected and hoped - not a nursing home.

However, this morning I was told that she's been having small seizures - not the kind where you flop all over the place, but smaller ones that essentially immobilize a person for up to a minute or so. I haven't seen this in action - although in the ER when they were trying to get her to walk she was really out of it, stopping and being unresponsive, but they had also pumped her with morphine for pain, so I thought that was what was going on. Perhaps it wasn't related to the morphine at all.

One good thing is that the doctor is reevaluating her meds because her blood pressure was way down, which could also cause the weakness and falling. They're taking her off two of the 14 or so meds she's been on, but they may end up adding another one for the seizures if the EEG and other neurology tests show that that's what's going on. I have to wonder if the med cocktail she's been taking could cause the seizures.

So, to recap. On the bright side:

1. She's here in town and it's easy enough for me to get to the hospital and do things that need to be done.
2. She clearly has a good medical care team here (I was nervous about that, all of these people being new to her situation).
3. She is mentally still very lucid and knows what's going on, and can still play rummy with me (and beat me, as she did this morning).
4. She's clearly in better shape now than a couple days ago.
5. She currently is a rehab-then-go-home candidate, not a nursing home placement candidate.

On the not-so-bright side:

1. She's having seizures
2. She is very weak and will have to spend time away from home to get stronger (but then see #5 above)
3. She's still 81 and has a lot wrong with her, which is a reality that cannot be helped by medicine. She is nearing the end of her life, and there's no changing that, though her life and hopefully quality of life can be extended. Could be a few more years, even, but still...

I'm trying to keep myself focused for teaching but it's not working. I haven't been to work at the chorch in a couple days and really could give a crap (although it also means my check will suck next week).

At least it's Friday and I will have some time to get some stuff done at home this weekend, since Mom's hospital is only 10 minutes away.

I will keep an update here as time and sanity permit.