My nephew made an awesome pasta dinner tonight. The apple pie is in the oven. My grand niece, Erin (2), has finally warmed up to me and graced me with her attention, and my oldest grand nephew, Owen (4) is clearly my biggest fan in the world. The youngest grand nephew, Aidan (7 mos.) is all smiles and gurgles. What more could a crazy Great Auntie wish for?
I've spent the last few days in The Land of my Birth, and as always, my heart is full while my body is tired. I've slept in a different place almost every night this week. Tomorrow I'm in my favorite hotel in the world at Nantasket Beach. I gots me a room with jacuzzi whirlpool and fireplace for $79. All to myself. No interlopers. The perfect transition between vagabond status and my drive home to my writing retreat.
That's right, it's time again for my January writing retreat. So glorious! So freeing! So wicked cheap!
I will more than likely be writing more interesting or at least well-considered things soon. Right now I'm floating on the scent of apple pah.
Showing posts with label Massachusetts. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Massachusetts. Show all posts
Saturday, January 01, 2011
Sunday, March 14, 2010
Stuck...
...and not happy about it. What's a traveler to do?
Of course this is a metaphor rife with life lessons and pithy quotes and Buddhist teachings.
But at the moment I'm talking about actually being stuck in the f'ing airport. I was supposed to take a 6 a.m. flight to Boston, but it was canceled. Not for the reason you're no doubt thinking of. (But Ms. Bizarro, the Nor'easter...) No, I was informed that it was canceled 3 hours before take off for "maintenance." If you're good at math, you can figure out that that meant I received an automated message from U.S. Air at 3 a.m. I then spoke to a representative who booked me on an early afternoon flight through Philly. Okay, well it meant less of a day with JET, my dearest friend who I essentially booked this flight to see.
I finally fell asleep at 6 a.m. Got up around 9:30, made breakfast, took my time, got to the airport in plenty of time, and after I checked in, got through security and got comfy waiting for boarding, the announcement came that the flight was 2 hours delayed. They announced this at 12:15 for a 12:30 boarding time.
And so now...stuck. In the airport with the screaming baby and his very ill mother a couple rows from me. They are a pair, these two hipster parents. I feel a little bad for them, and for the bambino (a toddler, not a real infant). But I also feel bad for me because I was supposed to have been in Boston an hour and a half ago. And I'm here, instead.
So now we've got later connecting flights out of LaGuardia, one of which will hopefully get us to Boston. And I strongarmed the U.S. Air ticket lady to give me a later return flight (Saturday instead of Friday) since I'd lost an entire day thanks to them. They tried to make me pay for it but I raised a mild tsunami and they eventually caved.
This means, however, that some lucky family member o' mine will have to get me to Logan by 6:30 a.m. on Saturday (I hadn't thought that far in advance - with spring breakers coming back to college it's going to be a mad house). Soooo I probably just traded one nightmare for another, right? I hope not. Bizarro and I have plans for our anniversary on Saturday.
This is a whole lot of venting because right now this is my only outlet. But let's take this being stuck thing to a whole...'nother....level. Being stuck is a state of mind. Yes, it's true, I cannot do much about my physical situation. I have options - stick this out and hope to God I eventually reach Boston, or cancel the entire trip and stay home for spring break. Other than that, I'm at the mercy of U.S. Air. I can be angry and indignant and walk around with a cloud over my head (which is tempting, I admit), or try to make the best of an unhappy situation. This is the reality of life in the air. Reality is what it is.
However, being the kind of person who always sees opportunities for optimizing, I would like offer this airport a few pointers:
- more outlets
- food options in the terminal (aside from coffee and lollipops)
- more seating
- more than 2 air carriers (U.S. Air and Continental Express)
That is my constructive criticism. It is much more helpful than a wanton rant.
And I really don't know where or how to end this post. I think I'll just sort of drift off into the ether...
Of course this is a metaphor rife with life lessons and pithy quotes and Buddhist teachings.
But at the moment I'm talking about actually being stuck in the f'ing airport. I was supposed to take a 6 a.m. flight to Boston, but it was canceled. Not for the reason you're no doubt thinking of. (But Ms. Bizarro, the Nor'easter...) No, I was informed that it was canceled 3 hours before take off for "maintenance." If you're good at math, you can figure out that that meant I received an automated message from U.S. Air at 3 a.m. I then spoke to a representative who booked me on an early afternoon flight through Philly. Okay, well it meant less of a day with JET, my dearest friend who I essentially booked this flight to see.
I finally fell asleep at 6 a.m. Got up around 9:30, made breakfast, took my time, got to the airport in plenty of time, and after I checked in, got through security and got comfy waiting for boarding, the announcement came that the flight was 2 hours delayed. They announced this at 12:15 for a 12:30 boarding time.
And so now...stuck. In the airport with the screaming baby and his very ill mother a couple rows from me. They are a pair, these two hipster parents. I feel a little bad for them, and for the bambino (a toddler, not a real infant). But I also feel bad for me because I was supposed to have been in Boston an hour and a half ago. And I'm here, instead.
So now we've got later connecting flights out of LaGuardia, one of which will hopefully get us to Boston. And I strongarmed the U.S. Air ticket lady to give me a later return flight (Saturday instead of Friday) since I'd lost an entire day thanks to them. They tried to make me pay for it but I raised a mild tsunami and they eventually caved.
This means, however, that some lucky family member o' mine will have to get me to Logan by 6:30 a.m. on Saturday (I hadn't thought that far in advance - with spring breakers coming back to college it's going to be a mad house). Soooo I probably just traded one nightmare for another, right? I hope not. Bizarro and I have plans for our anniversary on Saturday.
This is a whole lot of venting because right now this is my only outlet. But let's take this being stuck thing to a whole...'nother....level. Being stuck is a state of mind. Yes, it's true, I cannot do much about my physical situation. I have options - stick this out and hope to God I eventually reach Boston, or cancel the entire trip and stay home for spring break. Other than that, I'm at the mercy of U.S. Air. I can be angry and indignant and walk around with a cloud over my head (which is tempting, I admit), or try to make the best of an unhappy situation. This is the reality of life in the air. Reality is what it is.
However, being the kind of person who always sees opportunities for optimizing, I would like offer this airport a few pointers:
- more outlets
- food options in the terminal (aside from coffee and lollipops)
- more seating
- more than 2 air carriers (U.S. Air and Continental Express)
That is my constructive criticism. It is much more helpful than a wanton rant.
And I really don't know where or how to end this post. I think I'll just sort of drift off into the ether...
Sunday, March 07, 2010
And now a real post
As mentioned earlier, my birthday was this past week. I'm not a big birthday celebration kind of gal, though it's always nice to do something fun. I usually plan my own birthday celebrations. The way I see things, it ceased being someone else's responsibility to plan my birthday after I turned 21. I'm not so keen on b-day cards because quite honestly it's a waste of paper and I just end up recycling them. It's fine to receive them and I always appreciate the thought, but the main thing is, it's not what makes my birthday special. Spending it with cool people is what makes it special, without the absurdity of "it's my birthday therefore I am queen."
This year Bizarro and I went with a couple friends of ours on the Seneca Lake wine trail. We hit about 6 wineries but paced ourselves so we could actually enjoy the wines and soak up the wine knowledge dropped on us by the somaliers. We even hit up Hazlitt, which was to us the bottom of the barrel (get it?) when it came to class, wine, and atmosphere. Our fave was Castel Grisch, followed closely by Red Newt. Our friends also treated us to a lovely lunch at Glenora winery as a birthday/ upcoming 5th wedding anniversary celebration. The day was awesomesauce - sunny, funny & boozy.
Heading now into the last week before spring break. I expect it will be crazy busy in the writing center where I tutor, and I've already heard whining from students with work due before and after the break. Honestly, I'm just getting a little too old for that nonsense. I really want to tell them to cram it and deal with it because if they think THIS is bad, just wait until six months after graduation when the first student loan payment is due.
Spending spring break in Boston with my fam and friends. Excited to see folks and spend St. Patty's day with Rrrrache (we have a long history of St. Patty's Day together). My main concern, though, is spending some QT with JET, who is going through something of a hard time right now.
Once I get there (flying) I'm going to rent an car and will hit the beach for some writing time every day. If I had a few more bucks to spare, I'd stay overnight at the hotel on the beach where I stayed last summer, but this time around I'm spending more on travel. It's all good. My brother and his wife will just have to put up with me. Heh.
Time to wind down the night and get a good sleep in before the onslaught of the week.
This year Bizarro and I went with a couple friends of ours on the Seneca Lake wine trail. We hit about 6 wineries but paced ourselves so we could actually enjoy the wines and soak up the wine knowledge dropped on us by the somaliers. We even hit up Hazlitt, which was to us the bottom of the barrel (get it?) when it came to class, wine, and atmosphere. Our fave was Castel Grisch, followed closely by Red Newt. Our friends also treated us to a lovely lunch at Glenora winery as a birthday/ upcoming 5th wedding anniversary celebration. The day was awesomesauce - sunny, funny & boozy.
Heading now into the last week before spring break. I expect it will be crazy busy in the writing center where I tutor, and I've already heard whining from students with work due before and after the break. Honestly, I'm just getting a little too old for that nonsense. I really want to tell them to cram it and deal with it because if they think THIS is bad, just wait until six months after graduation when the first student loan payment is due.
Spending spring break in Boston with my fam and friends. Excited to see folks and spend St. Patty's day with Rrrrache (we have a long history of St. Patty's Day together). My main concern, though, is spending some QT with JET, who is going through something of a hard time right now.
Once I get there (flying) I'm going to rent an car and will hit the beach for some writing time every day. If I had a few more bucks to spare, I'd stay overnight at the hotel on the beach where I stayed last summer, but this time around I'm spending more on travel. It's all good. My brother and his wife will just have to put up with me. Heh.
Time to wind down the night and get a good sleep in before the onslaught of the week.
Monday, February 08, 2010
On the way.
It's February, which means March is almost here. March has many good things. It has my birthday, my wedding anniversary with Bizarro (5 years), and Spring Break, for which I am headed to the land of my birthing (South Shore of Boston).
The new schedule is starting to feel a little more sane. I am not worried about it at this point. I am happy as a clam to have all this work and to have a plan for summer (teach screenwriting in Korea).
The new schedule is starting to feel a little more sane. I am not worried about it at this point. I am happy as a clam to have all this work and to have a plan for summer (teach screenwriting in Korea).
Tuesday, August 18, 2009
The Summer of 2009
Well ladies and germs, the summer is rapidly closing. Another week and 2 days and it's back in the classroom. I have a full teaching load this semester: 2 sections of intro to screenwriting at the Other School On the Hill, and one section of English 99 (developmental writing at the paragraph level) at the community college. For these gigs I am grateful. Now I'm trying to cram as much summer into the coming week and 2 days as possible. Summer weather is finally here, so swimming and patio grilling are required activities (though there are t'storms coming but whatever, as long as it's hot).
As you know, this was not the summer I'd planned. I ended up not teaching at all, and instead worked as a transcriptionist, tutor, and house keeper for the Catlic' Chorch, scrubbing the priests' terlets and washing their undies. (My sister-in-law asked whether the skid marks in a priest's undies are in the form of a crucifix. This is why I love my sister-in-law.)
So, no, not what I'd expected but the truth is that in true form, the Universe provided just what I needed. In fact our money was very tight this summer, but it forced us to be more mindful of our spending, and helped us to come together for the betterment of our household. Tracking expenses and keeping more in tune with our financial situation has been good for us both, and for our marriage.
The work I did at the rectory was actually quite easy, and since I was alone and autonomous, I had plenty of opportunity to manage my time as I saw fit, and I believe that the physical nature of the work was good for me. I tend to get stuck up here (points to head) and that's not always a good thing.
The transcription work was just fine, and it might even be useful in the future to say that I am familiar with chemical notations (who knows what kind of technical writing I might fall into at some point).
The tutoring is always fun and keeps me on the ESL map for my C.V.
Aside from my work, I had plenty of time for writing, and I was, I must say, rather prolific. I am just about finished with Sentinel, have started a new project, and most thrilling of all, I met a producer/filmmaker from L.A. who is producing a short script of mine, and who has connections that could really help me out.
I didn't get to go windsurfing, but I did spend a day at the Nor'easter Surf Shop in Scituate, Mass. and took excellent notes for my surf-related T.V. pilot. I also made a great connection for surfing lessons when I am able to give that a whirl. And the surfing season isn't over in September, so there's still a chance I could get a long weekend in and get a surfing lesson! (I'm talking surfing, not windsurfing, to be clear on that.)
Despite our financial hardship, I found a way with the help of friends to attend the Live Adventure this year (the annual live action role playing weekend I've been part of since 1991). That was a magical, wonderful, fun (if hotter than hell) weekend of beloved friends, creative imagination, camping, and music. I am so grateful!
This summer gave me ample time and opportunity to work through my grief, and I managed two trips to Massachusetts, one with Bizarro in tow, which has been extremely beneficial in my healing process. I was able to spend some QT with my beloved nephew and his family, my Big Bro, PMP, JET, Rachee and a couple other people I've known and loved for years. This recent trip was exceptionally fun with Bizarro - our day in Boston was delightful, especially hanging out with PMP who took us for fabulous cannoli in the North End. I also got to play in the waves at Nantasket, despite the drizzle. Oh how I miss the ocean!
I feel like I'm starting to finally come out of the darkness that was last winter, just before, during and after Mom's death. I am feeling more alive than ever; I can feel the possibilities of life, the energy of creation, and the wealth that is mine in so many ways. In the parlance of Live Adventure folk: Game on!
As you know, this was not the summer I'd planned. I ended up not teaching at all, and instead worked as a transcriptionist, tutor, and house keeper for the Catlic' Chorch, scrubbing the priests' terlets and washing their undies. (My sister-in-law asked whether the skid marks in a priest's undies are in the form of a crucifix. This is why I love my sister-in-law.)
So, no, not what I'd expected but the truth is that in true form, the Universe provided just what I needed. In fact our money was very tight this summer, but it forced us to be more mindful of our spending, and helped us to come together for the betterment of our household. Tracking expenses and keeping more in tune with our financial situation has been good for us both, and for our marriage.
The work I did at the rectory was actually quite easy, and since I was alone and autonomous, I had plenty of opportunity to manage my time as I saw fit, and I believe that the physical nature of the work was good for me. I tend to get stuck up here (points to head) and that's not always a good thing.
The transcription work was just fine, and it might even be useful in the future to say that I am familiar with chemical notations (who knows what kind of technical writing I might fall into at some point).
The tutoring is always fun and keeps me on the ESL map for my C.V.
Aside from my work, I had plenty of time for writing, and I was, I must say, rather prolific. I am just about finished with Sentinel, have started a new project, and most thrilling of all, I met a producer/filmmaker from L.A. who is producing a short script of mine, and who has connections that could really help me out.
I didn't get to go windsurfing, but I did spend a day at the Nor'easter Surf Shop in Scituate, Mass. and took excellent notes for my surf-related T.V. pilot. I also made a great connection for surfing lessons when I am able to give that a whirl. And the surfing season isn't over in September, so there's still a chance I could get a long weekend in and get a surfing lesson! (I'm talking surfing, not windsurfing, to be clear on that.)
Despite our financial hardship, I found a way with the help of friends to attend the Live Adventure this year (the annual live action role playing weekend I've been part of since 1991). That was a magical, wonderful, fun (if hotter than hell) weekend of beloved friends, creative imagination, camping, and music. I am so grateful!
This summer gave me ample time and opportunity to work through my grief, and I managed two trips to Massachusetts, one with Bizarro in tow, which has been extremely beneficial in my healing process. I was able to spend some QT with my beloved nephew and his family, my Big Bro, PMP, JET, Rachee and a couple other people I've known and loved for years. This recent trip was exceptionally fun with Bizarro - our day in Boston was delightful, especially hanging out with PMP who took us for fabulous cannoli in the North End. I also got to play in the waves at Nantasket, despite the drizzle. Oh how I miss the ocean!
I feel like I'm starting to finally come out of the darkness that was last winter, just before, during and after Mom's death. I am feeling more alive than ever; I can feel the possibilities of life, the energy of creation, and the wealth that is mine in so many ways. In the parlance of Live Adventure folk: Game on!
Thursday, August 06, 2009
The long and winding road
The last 2 weeks have rather heinous. I have been fighting off some ailment or another, and of course cramps in the middle of all that, trying to prep for going to Massachusetts on Monday, then to Live Adventure on Friday. Not feeling up to doing anything but lying around, so it's been stressful knowing that I have a pile of things to do and I'm not getting to them.
But I know that by the time Monday morning rolls around everything will be done and we'll be on our way to Boston, where I shall dazzle Bizarro with the wonders of New England.
The plan:
- on the nicest day we have there, go to the beach and tool around the South Shore
- on the other day, go into Boston, hang out on the Common, visit Quincy Market, the Acquarium, and have a cannoli from the North End hanging out at the waterfront.
- dinner with my friends and family at my bro's house
- as much beach time as I can squeeze in
And of course the semester is on its way; I have to turn in my course reserves tomorrow and I'm not ready. I also have to still pick out an adaptation to use. In years past I've used "Big Fish," but as that revolves around a parent's death, I will not be using that film this time.
So yeah lots to do and running out of time. It would help if I didn't feel ill.
But I know that by the time Monday morning rolls around everything will be done and we'll be on our way to Boston, where I shall dazzle Bizarro with the wonders of New England.
The plan:
- on the nicest day we have there, go to the beach and tool around the South Shore
- on the other day, go into Boston, hang out on the Common, visit Quincy Market, the Acquarium, and have a cannoli from the North End hanging out at the waterfront.
- dinner with my friends and family at my bro's house
- as much beach time as I can squeeze in
And of course the semester is on its way; I have to turn in my course reserves tomorrow and I'm not ready. I also have to still pick out an adaptation to use. In years past I've used "Big Fish," but as that revolves around a parent's death, I will not be using that film this time.
So yeah lots to do and running out of time. It would help if I didn't feel ill.
Thursday, July 23, 2009
In all seriousness I have nothing to be grumpy about. Our financials are looking up with Bizarro's bonus and my paychecks being stronger than I'd anticipated. We're on a budget and it's working out well. I've been writing and getting things done.
But last night I realized was 6 months to the day (Wed. the 22nd) that Mom died. I had a hard time falling asleep anyway because it's so damned muggy and gross, but then weird shit kept happening.
Weird shit? you ask. Yeah like a pile of pots and pans that I need to bring to Salvo suddenly fell over on it's own. I kept hearing things that, with my earplugs on, I couldn't tell what they were. (I know that's a grammatically fucked up sentence but I don't care.) I got up numerous times and at one point saw a centipede crossing the room. SERIOUSLY? A centipede. EW GROSS. I had to dispatch the centipede or there was no way I was ever going to sleep. Just a really frickin' aweful night. And of course these things always happen the night before I have to get up and clean house at the rectory, so that I'm a zombie.
And that's where I'm off to now. My head feels like a trash compacter, only instead of trash it's snot. This weather is killing me.
But on the bright side, we are going to Massachusetts next month so there's something to look forward to. I hope there's some decent weather when we get there.
Oh crap time to go to work.
But last night I realized was 6 months to the day (Wed. the 22nd) that Mom died. I had a hard time falling asleep anyway because it's so damned muggy and gross, but then weird shit kept happening.
Weird shit? you ask. Yeah like a pile of pots and pans that I need to bring to Salvo suddenly fell over on it's own. I kept hearing things that, with my earplugs on, I couldn't tell what they were. (I know that's a grammatically fucked up sentence but I don't care.) I got up numerous times and at one point saw a centipede crossing the room. SERIOUSLY? A centipede. EW GROSS. I had to dispatch the centipede or there was no way I was ever going to sleep. Just a really frickin' aweful night. And of course these things always happen the night before I have to get up and clean house at the rectory, so that I'm a zombie.
And that's where I'm off to now. My head feels like a trash compacter, only instead of trash it's snot. This weather is killing me.
But on the bright side, we are going to Massachusetts next month so there's something to look forward to. I hope there's some decent weather when we get there.
Oh crap time to go to work.
Saturday, July 11, 2009
Abundance
Trying to see what I can learn in the muck of this summer. Not having a job I thought I had, doing odd jobs to make ends meet hand to mouth, probably having to cancel the tiny trip to Massachusetts that Bizarro and I had planned for next month (I'm still holding out hope that somehow we can swing it, but it doesn't look good).
Being aware of the bounty in my life is the thing that strikes me here. I have a tendency to see the glass half empty and continuing to drain away. I don't see the good things all around me. I only see things I don't have, or want to have, or what other people have that I feel I deserve because they're no better than me.
And that usually turns into a self-flagellating episode where I go over every "bad" decision I've ever made, and I become despondent and helpless. It's a vicious cycle of negativity that I MUST break if I'm ever going to make my life a better place to live.
I've started an "abundance list" and I keep adding to it. I carry it around in my purse so it's there for me to visit when I start the "poor me" vibes begin to escalate.
I know everyone is having a hard time; these economic times suck for everyone. But I also know that I've been in this cycle of poverty consciousness pretty much from my early 20s, no matter what the economy was doing. This is what I need to remember: let the past go and only see the bounty that is in my life at present, as I make my way into the future.
The truth of the matter is that this poverty consciousness (as I call it) isn't just unique to me. I see others in my family, including my Mother, with some of the same patterns and traits. It's up to me to break this, for my Mom as well as myself and my husband.
Being aware of the bounty in my life is the thing that strikes me here. I have a tendency to see the glass half empty and continuing to drain away. I don't see the good things all around me. I only see things I don't have, or want to have, or what other people have that I feel I deserve because they're no better than me.
And that usually turns into a self-flagellating episode where I go over every "bad" decision I've ever made, and I become despondent and helpless. It's a vicious cycle of negativity that I MUST break if I'm ever going to make my life a better place to live.
I've started an "abundance list" and I keep adding to it. I carry it around in my purse so it's there for me to visit when I start the "poor me" vibes begin to escalate.
I know everyone is having a hard time; these economic times suck for everyone. But I also know that I've been in this cycle of poverty consciousness pretty much from my early 20s, no matter what the economy was doing. This is what I need to remember: let the past go and only see the bounty that is in my life at present, as I make my way into the future.
The truth of the matter is that this poverty consciousness (as I call it) isn't just unique to me. I see others in my family, including my Mother, with some of the same patterns and traits. It's up to me to break this, for my Mom as well as myself and my husband.
Friday, June 12, 2009
Get off my back!
I know it's been awhile and I have a bunch to catch up on.
My vacay in lovely Massachusetts was truly remarkable. I spent lots of QT with myself, family, friends, and the ocean. Had a magnificent stay at the Clarion Nantasket hotel for 2 nights on the beach, went to a longboard competition, hung out in a surf shop taking notes for my planned TV pilot, did some impromptu ghost hunting at a Revolutionary War bunker (and I think caught me an EVP, though so far only brother has been able to hear what I heard on the video clip). I also had lots of baby time with Erin and May, and played with Owen as much as I could. Got to hang out with PMP in Boston, saw Fenway Park, had drinks at the Bleacher Bar, ate lots of seafood, went to Plymouth on my last day, a very rainy day, with one of my recently former students, and got to hang with Rache at my beach hotel for a night.
Coming home - well. So. Reality setting in. A class to teach starting Monday - for which I am grateful, especially since apparently it WASN'T a done deal until yesterday. I got the call to teach and I was like "welll yeahhhh I've been planning on it." So anyway, it's all good.
Still no idea where I'm teaching this fall. I have started a preliminary job search in the Boston/South Shore area. I had two (count 'em) interviews while I was there, with little to no effort on my part. One was for an ESL teaching position with some possibility for long-term work, the other as a communications specialist for a company that does research and fund-raising for MS cures (among other things).
I really don't know where things are heading right now. Some serious thinking and decision making coming up in the coming months. I am feeling more disheartened than ever here in the City on the Edge of Forever (yeah, I didn't get that job at the community college after all). After 3.5 years of searching I've had maybe 4 interviews. A week in Mass. and I get 2 interviews without even really trying.
And truth is, no place has ever felt like home to me other than the South Shore. At the same time, change is scary. I've lived here longer than anyplace else in recent history. Despite how unhappy I often am with this area (weather, cold dark apartment, allergies, isolation, lack of career opportunity, lack of the ocean, etc.) it's in many ways easier to keep on in the same direction than to try a new one. God knows I've moved so often in my life. It would be nice to feel settled with a home base. I'm just not convinced that "here" is where my home base should be.
A little much to think about right now, I know. I'm still dealing with Mom's death and the giant hole it's left in my life. Perhaps that is why I feel so attracted to my family right now, especially the grand-babies. I missed my nephew's growing up and I really hate the thought of missing theirs.
For the time being I'm just trying to get myself geared up for the summer teaching job and will see how some of this other stuff lands. Getting myself back into a schedule will feel really good. The pool is open, so I will swim and go for walks and continue working on my fitness/weight loss plan. I am very bummed that I have no time or money for the windsurfing beginners clinic this weekend. Still I'm sure there'll be other opportunities, and I'm also thinking I want to try my hands at kayaking this summer. And of course Yoga. Making the most of where I am and what I have at my disposal for the summer. The rest will be dealt with in good time...
My vacay in lovely Massachusetts was truly remarkable. I spent lots of QT with myself, family, friends, and the ocean. Had a magnificent stay at the Clarion Nantasket hotel for 2 nights on the beach, went to a longboard competition, hung out in a surf shop taking notes for my planned TV pilot, did some impromptu ghost hunting at a Revolutionary War bunker (and I think caught me an EVP, though so far only brother has been able to hear what I heard on the video clip). I also had lots of baby time with Erin and May, and played with Owen as much as I could. Got to hang out with PMP in Boston, saw Fenway Park, had drinks at the Bleacher Bar, ate lots of seafood, went to Plymouth on my last day, a very rainy day, with one of my recently former students, and got to hang with Rache at my beach hotel for a night.
Coming home - well. So. Reality setting in. A class to teach starting Monday - for which I am grateful, especially since apparently it WASN'T a done deal until yesterday. I got the call to teach and I was like "welll yeahhhh I've been planning on it." So anyway, it's all good.
Still no idea where I'm teaching this fall. I have started a preliminary job search in the Boston/South Shore area. I had two (count 'em) interviews while I was there, with little to no effort on my part. One was for an ESL teaching position with some possibility for long-term work, the other as a communications specialist for a company that does research and fund-raising for MS cures (among other things).
I really don't know where things are heading right now. Some serious thinking and decision making coming up in the coming months. I am feeling more disheartened than ever here in the City on the Edge of Forever (yeah, I didn't get that job at the community college after all). After 3.5 years of searching I've had maybe 4 interviews. A week in Mass. and I get 2 interviews without even really trying.
And truth is, no place has ever felt like home to me other than the South Shore. At the same time, change is scary. I've lived here longer than anyplace else in recent history. Despite how unhappy I often am with this area (weather, cold dark apartment, allergies, isolation, lack of career opportunity, lack of the ocean, etc.) it's in many ways easier to keep on in the same direction than to try a new one. God knows I've moved so often in my life. It would be nice to feel settled with a home base. I'm just not convinced that "here" is where my home base should be.
A little much to think about right now, I know. I'm still dealing with Mom's death and the giant hole it's left in my life. Perhaps that is why I feel so attracted to my family right now, especially the grand-babies. I missed my nephew's growing up and I really hate the thought of missing theirs.
For the time being I'm just trying to get myself geared up for the summer teaching job and will see how some of this other stuff lands. Getting myself back into a schedule will feel really good. The pool is open, so I will swim and go for walks and continue working on my fitness/weight loss plan. I am very bummed that I have no time or money for the windsurfing beginners clinic this weekend. Still I'm sure there'll be other opportunities, and I'm also thinking I want to try my hands at kayaking this summer. And of course Yoga. Making the most of where I am and what I have at my disposal for the summer. The rest will be dealt with in good time...
Monday, May 25, 2009
In Memorium
Today's about catching up the last week lost to The Sickness. Housework, laundry, and also getting a reading picked out for Mom's interment this Friday. Big Bro and his Wiffen are arriving on Wednesday, so I want the place to be ready for them. Peege and Beck are here Thursday, staying in a hotel. I am really looking forward to having my family around me again.
And of course I'm chomping at the bit to get to Mass. We've decided not to waste over $700 on an eleven-year-old car that keeps cropping up new problems. If I get this job I'm waiting for, I will purchase a good pre-owned car and leave this one to Bizarro for in-town driving. It is more economical to rent a used car via the place we've done before and have a safe, solid car to drive out in. I had thought to ride with Peege and family and rent a wreck when I got to Mass, but I need the alone time that driving can offer me. Road-tripping with my bad self.
I am ready for adventure, new sights, new experiences, new thoughts, new feelings, new insights. Let the Games begin!
I have arranged to spend some time at a surf shop in Scituate to do some research for the TV pilot I'm still working up. Gotta get some real-life people to inspire this thing. Also going to take a stab at writing a rom com this summer, which is way out of my comfort zone, but I need to change things up from the artsy/fantasy stuff for a bit. My manager friend says my idea so far is pretty conventional, so I need to spice it up. And you know in rom com spice often = raunch. Not so sure how well I can write raunch. I'll get back to you on that.
And of course I'm chomping at the bit to get to Mass. We've decided not to waste over $700 on an eleven-year-old car that keeps cropping up new problems. If I get this job I'm waiting for, I will purchase a good pre-owned car and leave this one to Bizarro for in-town driving. It is more economical to rent a used car via the place we've done before and have a safe, solid car to drive out in. I had thought to ride with Peege and family and rent a wreck when I got to Mass, but I need the alone time that driving can offer me. Road-tripping with my bad self.
I am ready for adventure, new sights, new experiences, new thoughts, new feelings, new insights. Let the Games begin!
I have arranged to spend some time at a surf shop in Scituate to do some research for the TV pilot I'm still working up. Gotta get some real-life people to inspire this thing. Also going to take a stab at writing a rom com this summer, which is way out of my comfort zone, but I need to change things up from the artsy/fantasy stuff for a bit. My manager friend says my idea so far is pretty conventional, so I need to spice it up. And you know in rom com spice often = raunch. Not so sure how well I can write raunch. I'll get back to you on that.
Friday, May 01, 2009
Closing a chapter
May is about closing a chapter, or rather a couple of chapters. It's the end of the semester, as you know, and I am now in charge of reading and grading 28 feature length script portfolios. I am sad and relieved at the same time to be getting ready to say goodbye to my students this semester, even more than usual. There were times over the last four months that teaching and seeing them and watching them work was the only thing that kept me going. I am grateful to them for that gift. But of course as always, it's time for them and me to move on. I am relieved because in other ways it was harder than ever to focus on my work and push through the times I just didn't want to move.
Another chapter feels like it's coming to a close at the end of this month, when we will bury Mom's cremains. My brother and I talked about this just a couple days ago, and how as that date comes nearer, we have both felt the reality of her loss more keenly. We've both been depressed and have both withdrawn from the world and from each other, but we agree that at this point it would be better for us to talk more regularly and share what we are each feeling. He said it perfectly the other night on the phone: I've lost my center.
This summer will be about getting back some of that centeredness. I am really looking forward to my time in Massachusetts in June for that very purpose.
Another chapter feels like it's coming to a close at the end of this month, when we will bury Mom's cremains. My brother and I talked about this just a couple days ago, and how as that date comes nearer, we have both felt the reality of her loss more keenly. We've both been depressed and have both withdrawn from the world and from each other, but we agree that at this point it would be better for us to talk more regularly and share what we are each feeling. He said it perfectly the other night on the phone: I've lost my center.
This summer will be about getting back some of that centeredness. I am really looking forward to my time in Massachusetts in June for that very purpose.
Monday, April 27, 2009
An off-beat day. Not sure why. Looking forward to Yoga tonight, then I really must go grocery shopping so there's something to eat around here.
I've been trying to get a vacation organized and haven't been able to decide where to stay. North Shore or South Shore? Quantity or quality? What do I want to get out of my time? Money is of course tight, especially since I worked out how little I will actually be getting paid for the summer course I'm teaching. I may well have to do some tutoring on the side to pay for my trip, which is also fine.
I've thought about going with Priceline.com to book a hotel, but I'm afraid of this kind of thing happening:
see more Lolcats and funny pictures
I've been trying to get a vacation organized and haven't been able to decide where to stay. North Shore or South Shore? Quantity or quality? What do I want to get out of my time? Money is of course tight, especially since I worked out how little I will actually be getting paid for the summer course I'm teaching. I may well have to do some tutoring on the side to pay for my trip, which is also fine.
I've thought about going with Priceline.com to book a hotel, but I'm afraid of this kind of thing happening:
see more Lolcats and funny pictures
Thursday, April 23, 2009
Summer Lovin'
I've landed a summer teaching gig at the community college next door to City on the Edge of Forever. It's a great schedule (MWF 10:30 - 12:30) and runs June 15 - Aug 7. It's not Boston, but I wasn't getting any real solid leads in Boston, and this was a job offer that I feel good about. I'm so glad I held out for a better situation than the first job offer from them for the summer (the one that started earlier in June and would have me in the classroom 5 days a week.) This way I can make some money, teach academic writing, and still have time and energy to make my film and write my scripts.
I will take a vacation to Boston in early June (just after my Mass peeps are here for the burial of the cremains), and may also head back out there in August for surfing lessons at Nantasket.
Feeling a lot less stressed out right now. Money will still be tight for a few weeks but I'm used to that in summer. The only thing that that will really suck is owing the Feds taxes (grrrrrr). Hopefully I can make an arrangement that won't involve signing my name in blood, donating my ears, or bashing anyone's knees in with a lead pipe a la Tanya Harding.
I will take a vacation to Boston in early June (just after my Mass peeps are here for the burial of the cremains), and may also head back out there in August for surfing lessons at Nantasket.
Feeling a lot less stressed out right now. Money will still be tight for a few weeks but I'm used to that in summer. The only thing that that will really suck is owing the Feds taxes (grrrrrr). Hopefully I can make an arrangement that won't involve signing my name in blood, donating my ears, or bashing anyone's knees in with a lead pipe a la Tanya Harding.
Saturday, April 11, 2009
Spring is in the air...
I am back to an exercise regimen. I will chronicle my exploits at home and on the blog, to help keep me motivated. Embarrassment is a great motivator. Today I did 17 mins cardio (7 on treadmill, 10 on elliptical) and 4 reps with hand weights. Not bad for the first actual workout I've had in months. I am tracking weekly weight loss as well, though I will not be posting those numbers here. I do have SOME modesty, after all.
In other news: what the fuck is up with the PIRATE SITUATION? The international cabal of navies and seals and commandos and heavy artillery are getting their asses handed to them. If it weren't so sad (with hostages and all) it would be goddamn funny.
This past week I called, emailed and researched the hell out of summer teaching jobs in the Boston area. I have CVs out from Salem to Ashburnham to Lexington to Cambridge. Once I get an offer I will have to find a place to stay, and will be pulling on every string I can find, no matter how frayed.
The UCLA gig is looking less likely, all things considered, and it's okay. I think that would be a bit much for me right now. I am willing to keep working on my scripts and continue a dialogue with my manager friend, and then when the time is right I will strike hard with a 2-3 week visit. I've talked with a couple people who were in Hollywood and who are advising me that there are better ways than moving out there and starving, hoping for a break. Since I'm not in production, I have other options.
I still am going to need a better job situation to move into at some point, but in the meantime I am going to focus on writing, finishing my film, getting my scripts into competitions, spending part of the summer as much by the beach as possible (and learning how to surf if I'm lucky), and will be ready to teach in the fall here in Central NY with bells on my toes. What happens after that, who knows...
Today I'm to meet a long lost friend who I'm excited to see again. She makes me laugh, and I need that right now.
Laughter is good medicine, as the saying goes. So is exercise, Yoga, and good food. Here's to spring!
In other news: what the fuck is up with the PIRATE SITUATION? The international cabal of navies and seals and commandos and heavy artillery are getting their asses handed to them. If it weren't so sad (with hostages and all) it would be goddamn funny.
This past week I called, emailed and researched the hell out of summer teaching jobs in the Boston area. I have CVs out from Salem to Ashburnham to Lexington to Cambridge. Once I get an offer I will have to find a place to stay, and will be pulling on every string I can find, no matter how frayed.
The UCLA gig is looking less likely, all things considered, and it's okay. I think that would be a bit much for me right now. I am willing to keep working on my scripts and continue a dialogue with my manager friend, and then when the time is right I will strike hard with a 2-3 week visit. I've talked with a couple people who were in Hollywood and who are advising me that there are better ways than moving out there and starving, hoping for a break. Since I'm not in production, I have other options.
I still am going to need a better job situation to move into at some point, but in the meantime I am going to focus on writing, finishing my film, getting my scripts into competitions, spending part of the summer as much by the beach as possible (and learning how to surf if I'm lucky), and will be ready to teach in the fall here in Central NY with bells on my toes. What happens after that, who knows...
Today I'm to meet a long lost friend who I'm excited to see again. She makes me laugh, and I need that right now.
Laughter is good medicine, as the saying goes. So is exercise, Yoga, and good food. Here's to spring!
Monday, March 02, 2009
Planes + Ice = Suckitude
I spent a wonderful weekend on the Cape with Racheeee, which ended in a horrid day of travel during a Nor'easter. Morning flight was canceled, afternoon flights delayed. Sat on a tiny freezing cold prop plane at La Guardia for freaking forever while they had to jump the batteries (I kid you not) and then wait in line to be de-iced.
But the weekend itself was layered with beach, waves, memories, laughter, fun, dreaming for the future, wonderful food, and Wellfleet Oysters! Took a lot of video on the Flip, which I need to get onto a DVD for Rachel. Thank you so much Rachel! I look forward to our future projects and collaborations!
But the weekend itself was layered with beach, waves, memories, laughter, fun, dreaming for the future, wonderful food, and Wellfleet Oysters! Took a lot of video on the Flip, which I need to get onto a DVD for Rachel. Thank you so much Rachel! I look forward to our future projects and collaborations!
Wednesday, February 04, 2009
Back in the Saddle (again)
Taught my two sections of screenwriting at the Other School on the Hill last night. They went well; some great students in both sections with original story ideas. This morning will teach my short film writing class at the community college - looking forward to that.
It felt weird to be back at work at first, but by the time I got into my first class things felt normal and by the end of class, I felt good. "Oh yeah, this is what I do," sorta thing.
Still cleaning up loose ends for Mom, like closing out her bank account and sending out copies of the death certificate to various institutions. I will be very grateful when this phase is done. It is very unpleasant. At the bank yesterday I had a difficult time maintaining my composure; it just seemed to make her death more "real."
We will have Mom's ashes interred on May 29th with a graveside ceremony and a reception afterwards. Any friends who read this here blog want to know more, you know how to reach me. I'll also be sending out a general announcement.
I am looking forward to a couple good getaway weekends at the end of the month/beginning of next month (Rache is flying me to Cape Cod and Bizarro and I made reservations weeks ago for Splash Lagoon for our anniversary). This weekend I had to back out of plans to attend a spa day with friends of mine for a birthday party, thanks to Ms. Car Thang's $420 damage. We now have to use two keys - one for the locks, one for the ignition. "1978 called. They want their car technology back."
All in all I'd say I'm not doing too badly. At the moment. Moments come and go, you know. Thanks to everyone who's reached out to me, especially Black Jack, if you're out there.
It felt weird to be back at work at first, but by the time I got into my first class things felt normal and by the end of class, I felt good. "Oh yeah, this is what I do," sorta thing.
Still cleaning up loose ends for Mom, like closing out her bank account and sending out copies of the death certificate to various institutions. I will be very grateful when this phase is done. It is very unpleasant. At the bank yesterday I had a difficult time maintaining my composure; it just seemed to make her death more "real."
We will have Mom's ashes interred on May 29th with a graveside ceremony and a reception afterwards. Any friends who read this here blog want to know more, you know how to reach me. I'll also be sending out a general announcement.
I am looking forward to a couple good getaway weekends at the end of the month/beginning of next month (Rache is flying me to Cape Cod and Bizarro and I made reservations weeks ago for Splash Lagoon for our anniversary). This weekend I had to back out of plans to attend a spa day with friends of mine for a birthday party, thanks to Ms. Car Thang's $420 damage. We now have to use two keys - one for the locks, one for the ignition. "1978 called. They want their car technology back."
All in all I'd say I'm not doing too badly. At the moment. Moments come and go, you know. Thanks to everyone who's reached out to me, especially Black Jack, if you're out there.
Friday, January 09, 2009
Surfing Nantasket
This is the place all my ocean/beach photos are from. I was here a couple weeks before this video was taken. I'd love to learn how to surf at Nantasket!
Tuesday, October 28, 2008
Thursday, October 23, 2008
Well it's been quite a roller coaster. Had a great weekend in Mass. but came back to the same old pile of shit which apparently got deeper while I wasn't looking.
Today I was wrestling with trying to figure out Mom's dialysis schedule and transportation for after her move, when the dialysis social worker came out with the news that Mom may have early stages of dementia.
WHAT THE FUCK PEOPLE? WHY ISN'T A DOCTOR ON THE PHONE WITH ME? WHY DO I HEAR THIS FROM A FUCKING SOCIAL WORKER? (A very nice, concerned social worker, but a social worker nonetheless).
She claimed that the nurses in Mom's dialysis unit had noticed her "slowing down" as did the social worker herself, and apparently the nurses in the ICU when she was in the hospital a couple weeks ago noticed her forgetfulness, too. JEZUZ FUCKING KRIST.
So now on top of the immense, indescribable stress of moving her out of county and her general state of affairs, we now have dementia to look forward to. Needless to say, I haven't mentioned any of this to Mom. She's cruising along as she usually does, and is happy to be moving closer to me. I can only pray that when she's set up in her new home, she will have enough support and will be comfortable for the remainder of her life. I pray to anyone who will listen with a kind heart that Mom doesn't end up without any of her marbles. That's how my Grandmother was when she died and I really truly do not think I can take it. I really don't think I will be able to cope if that happens to my own Mother. My Momazoo.
Today I was wrestling with trying to figure out Mom's dialysis schedule and transportation for after her move, when the dialysis social worker came out with the news that Mom may have early stages of dementia.
WHAT THE FUCK PEOPLE? WHY ISN'T A DOCTOR ON THE PHONE WITH ME? WHY DO I HEAR THIS FROM A FUCKING SOCIAL WORKER? (A very nice, concerned social worker, but a social worker nonetheless).
She claimed that the nurses in Mom's dialysis unit had noticed her "slowing down" as did the social worker herself, and apparently the nurses in the ICU when she was in the hospital a couple weeks ago noticed her forgetfulness, too. JEZUZ FUCKING KRIST.
So now on top of the immense, indescribable stress of moving her out of county and her general state of affairs, we now have dementia to look forward to. Needless to say, I haven't mentioned any of this to Mom. She's cruising along as she usually does, and is happy to be moving closer to me. I can only pray that when she's set up in her new home, she will have enough support and will be comfortable for the remainder of her life. I pray to anyone who will listen with a kind heart that Mom doesn't end up without any of her marbles. That's how my Grandmother was when she died and I really truly do not think I can take it. I really don't think I will be able to cope if that happens to my own Mother. My Momazoo.
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