Doncha worry none!

Looking back on the last few posts, I realize that things may seem to be awfully poopy. Truth is, I'm feeling great. I'm making new waves and looking for new opportunities. I feel like I'm finally ready to make the big leap into...something. Not sure what, yet. Something new is out there for me. A writing career, a new place to live, a new location. The ocean. It's almost time. Meanwhile, I am shaking the last of the crud from my mootsies. I guess that's what the recent posts have been all about.

I have come of age

I've been officially blocked from someone's blog! I guess this means I've made it in the Cyber Information Technology Age of the 21st Century. Now, I know what you're thinking: Ms. Bizarro, what did you do to deserve that? Did you cuss someone out in your comments? Did you stalk them and send lasciviously threatening emails? Did you feed their cats poisoned onions? I almost wish I had done any of those things, because then I'd get why I've been blacklisted from this person's life. Close as I can figure, I've been excommunicated because I forgot a birthday (yes, really). Nevermind this person didn't bother to make it to my mother's funeral (yes, really). But the truth is, at this point, I don't need the rotting pork stinking up the kitchen just when things are getting good. And hey, it's one less label (okay, two less labels) for me to have to worry about blogging.

because I like me a motif

New Semester, New Attitude

The semester is officially underway, and I am officially "in the world but not of it." IOW, I'm not sweating the stupid shit. My sights are on the future, making plans, trying on new ideas for a new way of life. That's right bitches. A. New. Way. Of. Life. That is to say: your shit is your shit, not my shit. Your problems are not my problems unless I agreed to make them my problems in the first place. Nobody owns me. This pretty much sums it up:



(Okay, I'm aware that that isn't a very Buddhist outlook. It's a bit overly-dramatic, but you get the idea.)

There'll be no more of THIS SHIT:


"Neener-neener-neener! My balls are made of iron!"

What the Dark Side really looks like

Star Wars Tai Chi from John Leo on Vimeo.

Why I have an anonymous blog

So I can say this:

I don't wanna fucking tutor and teach. I just want to write. All day. Every day. Maybe do some laundry in there but mostly just writing, schmoozing and taking a dip in the pool when the weather calls for it.

There. I said it.

Too many notes

It has come to my oft-times scattered attention that I do, in fact, have too many blogs. I have this one, plus three non-anonymous blogs: one for writing, one for my film, and one for my pursuit of physical and personal wellness. It occurs to me that as I'm compartmentalizing these aspects of my life, it actually makes things harder. Not only am I trying to update too many blogs, but Blogger is increasingly harsh about me using a Yahoo account to run this one. It's always trying to trick me into signing in with my Google account (from which all the other blogs are run), and it won't let me be signed into both at the same time, so I'm constantly signing out and signing in and signing out and signing in. It's a total pain in my butt.

I am toying with the idea of retiring this blog and sending you all over to my main blog, which would be my writing blog.

However, this blog, being mainly anonymous, is a great place to be stupid and vent spleen. Not something I want to share with potential employers or even present ones, necessarily.

What to do?

Brilliant

Too bad the video goes out of synch 3/4 of the way through. Still brilliant, tho.

Doctor Who Rides Again

P.S. Had to delete unnecessary ellipsis after my title! What is WRONG with me?

A drivel-ly sort of day. Just sort of slunk by, mainly unnoticed save for a couple of small successes (finishing off my syllabus for the Fall semester and sending Chase credit card a big fat check for a GRAND. Yes, as in a thousand U.S. clams).

Other than that, the day made a noise sort of like the T.A.R.D.I.S. wheezing. Only it was all day.

Lately I've noticed a very disturbing trend. I've started to use ellipsis where a comma would do very nicely. This is a horrible habit, as evidenced by some horrible writing that I had a hand in proofreading over the winter months last year. Somehow, I've started doing it myself, and it's truly horrifying. I need to write little sticky notes and place them strategically all over the house to brainwash myself that COMMAS ARE ALL YOU NEED. Ellipsisisises have a very specific use, after all:

I am not a tumbleweed

Well it's finally happened, dear readers. I'm starting to feel at home here in the City on the Edge of Forever. The whining has generally stopped (although, just wait for winter). This year has been filled with awesomesauce - roller derby and Kung Fu/T'ai Chi school, new friends and cool people to hang out with. I've started meditating on a regular basis again, and I've committed to being healthy in body as well as mind and soul.

Also, I have two pretty decent jobs, and I am intent on parlaying one of them into a full-time gig. I am not worrying about anyone else's "stuff" right now; I'm focusing on creating the life I want. This means I am excited about things I haven't been excited about for quite some time. It also means that life in one's forties is a really dynamic time, which is quite the opposite of what I used to think (when I was in my thirties and trying to figure the world out). The good news is that I don't have to figure the world out! I only have to figure myself out, but with grace and not under pressure.

I've realized over the last few days that I've resisted the desire to set in roots (for a number of reasons, most of which stretch back to when I was 10 years old, and I don't want to bore you with all of that now). But in reality, there is no reason to resist this. I am not a tumbleweed, after all.

Next up: more lucrative, creative work, a house or condo to buy, and stronger ankles/knees so I can start skating again. Just watch me!

Simplify, simplify

My new life mantra = simplify. From blog headings to weekly menus to organization systems to my morning routine. This is how it's gonna be from now on. See what living in another country can do for you? In Korea, my existence was very simplified; my living environment was simple, my routine was simple (but never boring). My mind was able to focus and I was able to do everything I needed and wanted. I also felt more at ease with things in general. There was no inner strife and conflict with "I want to do this, but I hafta do that; I need to do that, but I wanna do this." I just did what the moment called for and didn't get stressed over it. Because why stress over things? Nothing's accomplished that way. Heck, even when my travel plans were in the balance and I needed help, I only panicked for a little while - then realized there was no point in hanging on to that feeling. I asked for help, and I got it. Nothing to worry about, really. And that's all about keeping it simple, and trusting the 'Verse.

So...how long can I maintain this outlook on my life? Hopefully it'll be a running theme that will continue to manifest, rather than get buried in the pressure of work and external obligations. Those are the most important times to remember this mantra, in fact. So do me a favor and remind me of this post when in two months I get whiny...

Back on the couch

I have returned from Korea, which you know if you've followed my lame-ass blogging attempts on Adventures of the Jade Monkey. I'm still posting photos of my trip there, so keep checking back.

Today (Sunday) I'm catching up on electronic media consumption and production. This means blogging, organizing photos, and catching up Doctor Who and Mad Men. Re: Doctor Who: OH. MY. GOD. Absolutely stunning. Re: Mad Men: That is some awesome writing. Don Draper is so twisted and pathetic that he's somehow almost sexy. Rodger Sterling is hilarious because he represents a pre-P.C. sense of humor. Still to come: Leverage and the last few eps of Night Gallery that I haven't seen. Bizarro and I started watching the entire series back in the winter/early spring. We're planning to do presentations at the next Rod Serling Conference about Night Gallery, so right now we're watching and re-watching eps for research (and for fun).

Tomorrow I will start attending to business as usual... slowly. One thing at a time, beginning with finances and figuring out who I need to call and what I need to put on the agenda for the week. Writing is #1, of course. I have 2 weeks before I have to return to work, so I'm making the most of the time.

I still have some unpacking to do, still laundry to do, and of course I have to have my ankle looked at (I sprained it AGAIN my last week in Korea). Processing my notes and thoughts will be essential before work starts and my brain becomes too filled with other people's work and concerns to develop my own. I did some work on the film while in Korea, which was really wonderful. Now I'm in a better place to start editing once I get a tutorial in Final Cut Pro. A very simple thing I realized: part of my procrastination has been my discomfort with the tech end of it. What a silly thing! I've got a filmmaker friend and colleague who's going to help me with that end of things.

I'm still dealing with some jet lag, though today I'm feeling much better than yesterday. Hopefully tonight I won't wake up at 3:00 a.m. in a cold sweat, totally disoriented, like I have the last 2 nights. It's all good - just a mild transition, that's all. I prepped myself for getting through jet lag via EFT before I even got on the plane. Nothing like pre-emptive EFT!

I'm uploading more photos to Adventures of the Jade Monkey now, so why not head over there and check them out?