So much for starting fresh. I blew my knee out on the dance floor last night because seriously this torn ACL thing is a fucking drag and I'm going to have to:
1. Buy $200 boots to keep my pronated ankles and knees happy.
2. Work out my quads and hamstrings to a ridiculous degree to take over the function of that ligament.
Right now I can't really bend that knee to sit cross legged, or straighten it completely. I believe it's called "swelling." I believe it's a really crappy way to bring in the new year. Should I take this as a sign of things to come?
Showing posts with label new year. Show all posts
Showing posts with label new year. Show all posts
Saturday, January 01, 2011
Friday, December 31, 2010
Auld Lang Syne, and 2011: Where you been all my life?
It's been a record year. My first full year without my Mom. A new job as a writing tutor at a community college. Derby! A summer in S. Korea, my home away from home. A new screenplay, and some useful notes on the sci fi bequeemoth script I've been writing since 2005. Space: 1999 entered my life in a way I didn't think possible. My long unanticipated return in front of the camera of a student film. Becoming a great auntie for the third time. Meeting Apolo Ohno in person! Seeing the Count Basie Orchestra in concert, a life-long dream. Joining a gym for the first time in my life. Matt Smith as Doctor Who! Spending Christmas in my own home for the first time since I was 23. Adopting Spaz Kitteh! Taking a stand for myself.
I am excited to spend New Year's Eve with my brother for the first time ever (I think, unless I'm forgetting something). This one 2010 has to share with 2011, though.
I have two intentions for the new year. As I've said before, resolutions are for guilt-ridden ex-Catholic school survivors who never feel their best is good enough. Fuck that shit with a rubber hose.
Intention #1: Stop trying to control everything. Thank the Universe for what's coming and don't try to qualify it. This means live in the moment without trying to build some kind of steam punk mirror contraption to see around every corner. It also means taking everything that comes along as an opportunity.
Intention #2: Get back in touch with relatives. After Mom died, I sequestered myself and withdrew from most family contact except for my brother and nephew. Time to reconnect with my lineage.
Happy New Year to you 'uns. Make the most of everything - zero regrets!
I am excited to spend New Year's Eve with my brother for the first time ever (I think, unless I'm forgetting something). This one 2010 has to share with 2011, though.
I have two intentions for the new year. As I've said before, resolutions are for guilt-ridden ex-Catholic school survivors who never feel their best is good enough. Fuck that shit with a rubber hose.
Intention #1: Stop trying to control everything. Thank the Universe for what's coming and don't try to qualify it. This means live in the moment without trying to build some kind of steam punk mirror contraption to see around every corner. It also means taking everything that comes along as an opportunity.
Intention #2: Get back in touch with relatives. After Mom died, I sequestered myself and withdrew from most family contact except for my brother and nephew. Time to reconnect with my lineage.
Happy New Year to you 'uns. Make the most of everything - zero regrets!
Sunday, February 14, 2010
Sunday, January 04, 2009
Reality Bites
So now we're well into 2009, and the peachy haze of the holidays and celebration and family and indoor water parks is starting to fade as we enter the first work week of the new year. I have a shitload of phone calls to make tomorrow, mainly on Mom's behalf. I need to set up an appointment to see the other nursing home/rehab center, and I also need to talk to the hospice nurse to try to get some kind of assessment. The big question is: is it an unreasonable expectation for Mom to try to get back to assisted living? Or is that just a pipe dream and we should start getting her ready to move to this other nursing facility (if in fact it is suitable)?
The other main focus of the next few days is getting ourselves back on budget after the last 2 weeks of frivolity. I will have student loan payments starting up again the middle of this year and I hope to gawd I have some way of paying those fckrz. I owe well let's just say I owe a lot, thanks to my MFA. But hey - at least I'm using that MFA to teach screenwriting! What I need is a full-time teaching gig, really. I am hoping that my part-time gig at the community college will blossom into something more permanent. There is no reason to believe that it can't - the program has grown exponentially, and they have plans to expand it in the coming years. Me being on the ground floor of that expansion is a very good thing, indeed.
Anyway, back to our budget - I have to very carefully think about where and how I want to spend and save my cash monies. I want to invest in my health and mental well-being, and stop wasting money on stupid shit like books and clothes I don't need (that's what the library and trendy 2nd-hand clothing stores are for). Also, I will stop buying pre-packaged cookie dough at nearly $4 a pop. Not to mention the deleterious effect it has on my waistline.
Another thing I have to do - or rather stop doing - is not snacking in the evenings. Oh. My. God. I do well all day long but when the sun sets and I'm on the couch reading or watching the boob toob, I just CRAVE JUNK. I have to figure something out. Herbal tea instead of cookies. EFT instead of caving.
Okay, so now I have some more refined intentions for 2009:
For mind/body: Yoga, swimming, meditation, eating yogurt instead of crap, drinking organic coffee.
For career: Invest more in my teaching and make daily dedicated time for writing.
For marriage: Set time aside for just us two, and find ways to have FUN together (not just sitting in front of the TV).
For Mom: Attend to her and her situation with love and compassion, even when dealing with sanctimonious nurses and addle-brained aides.
The other main focus of the next few days is getting ourselves back on budget after the last 2 weeks of frivolity. I will have student loan payments starting up again the middle of this year and I hope to gawd I have some way of paying those fckrz. I owe well let's just say I owe a lot, thanks to my MFA. But hey - at least I'm using that MFA to teach screenwriting! What I need is a full-time teaching gig, really. I am hoping that my part-time gig at the community college will blossom into something more permanent. There is no reason to believe that it can't - the program has grown exponentially, and they have plans to expand it in the coming years. Me being on the ground floor of that expansion is a very good thing, indeed.
Anyway, back to our budget - I have to very carefully think about where and how I want to spend and save my cash monies. I want to invest in my health and mental well-being, and stop wasting money on stupid shit like books and clothes I don't need (that's what the library and trendy 2nd-hand clothing stores are for). Also, I will stop buying pre-packaged cookie dough at nearly $4 a pop. Not to mention the deleterious effect it has on my waistline.
Another thing I have to do - or rather stop doing - is not snacking in the evenings. Oh. My. God. I do well all day long but when the sun sets and I'm on the couch reading or watching the boob toob, I just CRAVE JUNK. I have to figure something out. Herbal tea instead of cookies. EFT instead of caving.
Okay, so now I have some more refined intentions for 2009:
For mind/body: Yoga, swimming, meditation, eating yogurt instead of crap, drinking organic coffee.
For career: Invest more in my teaching and make daily dedicated time for writing.
For marriage: Set time aside for just us two, and find ways to have FUN together (not just sitting in front of the TV).
For Mom: Attend to her and her situation with love and compassion, even when dealing with sanctimonious nurses and addle-brained aides.
Thursday, January 01, 2009
Happy 2009
Well here we are in 2009. Only 3 more years until the Mayan calendar ends and we are all doomed. So tonight I'm gonna party like it's 1999... (yeah, remember the LAST time the world was supposed to end nine years ago?)
We're enjoying our time in Cleveland, bolstered by the fact that Mom is doing so much better, so I can turn off the long-range Elsie censors and allow myself to stand down and relax. Bizarro is enjoying his new tiny-ass computer, and I am still feeling quite overjoyed from our 2 days at Splash Lagoon. What a marvelous invention. We decided from now on whenever we come to Cleveland, we'll build an overnight in Erie for Splash Lagoon. We were both like 10 years olds in that place - SO much fun. I can't remember the last time I had that much fun, in a juvenile, elemental kind of way.
Okay, so as promised, the lists of '08 - '09:
The review of '08: Accomplished some goals: taught more screenwriting and ESL, started some new writing projects and moved forward on a couple standing ones. Didn't get to enter a lot of competitions (only a couple) or get an agent. Rediscovered my power element - Water. Discovered wind surfing in my town and entered an obsession with surfing in general. I made some new friends in '08, though not close yet. Started a Yoga class, but stopped when Mom's situation got so bad that I was at the hospital/nursing home every night. Though Mom's health usurped the last 2 months of the year, she finished out the year feeling better and in much lighter spirits, which means my world has achieved some sense of normalcy as well.
Nine intentions for '09:
1. Continue building my teaching career.
2. Continue building my writing career: finish the two older works, enter them in competition, write a TV pilot, form a writing group (already in the making).
3. Create new bonds of friendship with folks from the windsurfing club.
4. Save a bunch of money and start up the first time home owners club.
5. Be strong yet flexible in everything I do.
6. Build my mind-body with fun exercise and regular meditation.
7. Spend as much time as possible by the beach - both at home and Nantasket.
8. Continue creating a healthy relationship with Bizarro.
9. Take better care of myself, in general.
We're enjoying our time in Cleveland, bolstered by the fact that Mom is doing so much better, so I can turn off the long-range Elsie censors and allow myself to stand down and relax. Bizarro is enjoying his new tiny-ass computer, and I am still feeling quite overjoyed from our 2 days at Splash Lagoon. What a marvelous invention. We decided from now on whenever we come to Cleveland, we'll build an overnight in Erie for Splash Lagoon. We were both like 10 years olds in that place - SO much fun. I can't remember the last time I had that much fun, in a juvenile, elemental kind of way.
Okay, so as promised, the lists of '08 - '09:
The review of '08: Accomplished some goals: taught more screenwriting and ESL, started some new writing projects and moved forward on a couple standing ones. Didn't get to enter a lot of competitions (only a couple) or get an agent. Rediscovered my power element - Water. Discovered wind surfing in my town and entered an obsession with surfing in general. I made some new friends in '08, though not close yet. Started a Yoga class, but stopped when Mom's situation got so bad that I was at the hospital/nursing home every night. Though Mom's health usurped the last 2 months of the year, she finished out the year feeling better and in much lighter spirits, which means my world has achieved some sense of normalcy as well.
Nine intentions for '09:
1. Continue building my teaching career.
2. Continue building my writing career: finish the two older works, enter them in competition, write a TV pilot, form a writing group (already in the making).
3. Create new bonds of friendship with folks from the windsurfing club.
4. Save a bunch of money and start up the first time home owners club.
5. Be strong yet flexible in everything I do.
6. Build my mind-body with fun exercise and regular meditation.
7. Spend as much time as possible by the beach - both at home and Nantasket.
8. Continue creating a healthy relationship with Bizarro.
9. Take better care of myself, in general.
Wednesday, December 24, 2008
Here Comes The Sun
The Winter Solstice has just passed, it's Hanukkah, and it's Christmas Eve. All festivals of the coming of the Light!
Here comes the sun, and I say, it's alright.
Mom seems to be doing a bit better, day by day, at least as far as her physical stamina. We're working on her emotional well-being now. Hospice volunteers are coming in to help out with this - a harpist came yesterday and will gladly come as often as Mom would like, and a massage therapist will come in on Tuesday nights for an hour. The truth is Mom deserved this kind of pampering years ago, but she would never allow herself.
She and I had another frank discussion about the future, the uncertainty of it, and her eventual death (which could come in a month or 5 years for all we know). I think it is very helpful to talk about this stuff while we're both calm (as opposed to when she's back from dialysis, feeling like crap and in pain, which is what happened the other night over the phone when she was upset that it would be her last Christmas). Of course, we have to give light to those emotions too, but it's helpful to share our thoughts together rather than feeling sorry for ourselves.
Bizarro and I are going for our little trip to Splash Lagoon and then to the Bizarro Clan in Cleveland next week. Just a Mon - Fri trip. I've stacked visitors for Mom, since I won't be seeing her for a few days. She's very supportive of our trip, for which I am thankful. Thank God I don't have one of those mothers who throw guilt trips around and play the poor victim that her only daughter has to rescue!
Turned in my grades last night, so now I have to get some things done for Mom and clean house, and then I want to start prepping for next semester's classes. And of course, I have a writing schedule to keep up! There are a couple competition deadlines coming up soon that I want to meet.
Soon I will post my annual year in review/year in preview for '08/'09.
Happy Holidays, everyone!
(photo from http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/e/e6/Myrtle_Beach_Sunrise1.jpg)
Wednesday, February 06, 2008
Year of the Earth Rat
Tomorrow marks the lunar new year, celebrated in many Asian countries. It's the Chinese Year of the Rat, or in Tibet, Earth Rat.
I am reposting the inspirational words of one of the Kagyu lineage's highest lamas, Kenting Tai Situpa. These are words I need to hear and live by, particularly the part about not engaging in negative, harmful or meaningless actions." That breeze? It's me turning over a new leaf.
"End of every Year is the Beginning of next Year, and the significance of this serves as a constant reminder of a very great truth.
The End of year is an opportunity to look back at the deeds of individuals and an opportunity to remind ourselves of the importance of not repeating negative, harmful and meaningless actions. Every New Year can be a wonderful opportunity to resolve not to repeat the same. On the other hand , if an individual has performed more positive things which might have contributed benefit to others and to the world, then you should rejoice that merit and should dedicate it for every sentient being for Peace and ultimately for limitless liberation.
Every New Year is also an important occasion and it is the time that we should generate a pure mind and takes a serious commitment for the coming year to generate more positive, compassionate, meaningful and beneficial intentions and actions for every sentient being to bring this world into a better condition with more harmony then past years.
May every one have healthy spirit, healthy body with great positive success!
May every Universe including this world have healthy environment!
May every sentient being become a recipient of blessing from every enlightened being to benefit every sentient being for their achievement of Ultimate and Limitless Peace!
With Sincere Prayers,
The Twelfth Kenting Tai Situpa
The Head of the Palpung Monastic Congregation of the Vajrayana Buddhism
I am reposting the inspirational words of one of the Kagyu lineage's highest lamas, Kenting Tai Situpa. These are words I need to hear and live by, particularly the part about not engaging in negative, harmful or meaningless actions." That breeze? It's me turning over a new leaf.
"End of every Year is the Beginning of next Year, and the significance of this serves as a constant reminder of a very great truth.
The End of year is an opportunity to look back at the deeds of individuals and an opportunity to remind ourselves of the importance of not repeating negative, harmful and meaningless actions. Every New Year can be a wonderful opportunity to resolve not to repeat the same. On the other hand , if an individual has performed more positive things which might have contributed benefit to others and to the world, then you should rejoice that merit and should dedicate it for every sentient being for Peace and ultimately for limitless liberation.
Every New Year is also an important occasion and it is the time that we should generate a pure mind and takes a serious commitment for the coming year to generate more positive, compassionate, meaningful and beneficial intentions and actions for every sentient being to bring this world into a better condition with more harmony then past years.
May every one have healthy spirit, healthy body with great positive success!
May every Universe including this world have healthy environment!
May every sentient being become a recipient of blessing from every enlightened being to benefit every sentient being for their achievement of Ultimate and Limitless Peace!
With Sincere Prayers,
The Twelfth Kenting Tai Situpa
The Head of the Palpung Monastic Congregation of the Vajrayana Buddhism
Tuesday, January 01, 2008
New Year's Day
So far we've had a good day. This morning our new futon was delivered (the old one was starting to fall apart - literally), so when Bizarro gets home it'll be out with old and how the F8ck do we put together the new? I've been on a cleaning spree since last night - much needed. It feels good. Again out with the old...
Our new year's eve was quiet but very nice. We opened a bottle of bubbly and toasted at midnight while watching the ball drop in Times Square (and might I say that Dick Clark looks and sounds a damn sight better than he did last year when he screwed up the count down!). Called our families just after midnight and such, and we also kept the tradition in Bizarro's family to turn on all the lights in the house and open all the inside doors for good luck in the new year!
Earlier today while I was dusting I listened to the Vienna Symphony play their traditional New Year's concert on NPR. I do enjoy me some Strauss waltzes (all of 'em).
I am content.
Our new year's eve was quiet but very nice. We opened a bottle of bubbly and toasted at midnight while watching the ball drop in Times Square (and might I say that Dick Clark looks and sounds a damn sight better than he did last year when he screwed up the count down!). Called our families just after midnight and such, and we also kept the tradition in Bizarro's family to turn on all the lights in the house and open all the inside doors for good luck in the new year!
Earlier today while I was dusting I listened to the Vienna Symphony play their traditional New Year's concert on NPR. I do enjoy me some Strauss waltzes (all of 'em).
I am content.
Monday, December 31, 2007
Last few hours of '07
Just want to say thanks to my Fred In the Can readers, and happy new year. Be safe out there tonight.
Sunrise at Gangeulgot, S. Korea, where the sun rises first on East Asia.
Sunrise at Gangeulgot, S. Korea, where the sun rises first on East Asia.
Saturday, December 29, 2007
The Final Countdown
Only a couple days left of 2007. Let's review, shall we?
The first half of '07 was great: I was teaching 2 sections of screenwriting and getting some of my own writing done. Went on my first writing retreat in the spring and got a couple pieces done. Spent most of the summer planning for the trip to Korea for my documentary. Got in a 2nd retreat at the end of summer.
The second half of '07 was less than ideal: mom went into the hospital with renal failure, I took a job out of town that paid me in monopoly money, I went to Korea during a brutal heat wave and ended up stuck with my travel plans canceled because of circumstances beyond my control, continued to deal with mom's health issues, splashed bacon grease on my face and neck, got screwed for grant money from work, my screenwriting class canceled for next semester, and gained more weight, putting me into a size 14 jeans.
Now the good news is that the past is the past, and after this post I shall think of these things no more. The book of 2007 is about to close forever. It's time to think of the coming year, and what I want it to look like.
So, without further ado...
My Intentions for 2008, in no particular order
- Finish revising Sentinel Station
- Complete first two drafts of Beauty Is...
- Renew my free lance writing career, even if it's only publishing 1 or 2 features
- Obtain a job that pays me what I'm worth and fulfills some aspect of my potential, whether it's a full- or part-time, teaching or non-teaching position.
- Find an exercise/health routine that works for me so that I can lose 20 lbs.
- Continue practicing Dharma with a focus on being compassionate to myself as well as all other sentient beings.
- Make a schedule that enables me to keep my priorities straight, such that I'm not cleaning the house when I should be writing. This entails establishing a routine for writing that won't be usurped by mere procrastination.
- Make a trip to Massachusetts with Bizarro so that he can see parts of New England, my old stomping grounds, and meet the rest of my family.
- Stay on my budget so that I can put some money away for a rainy day.
- Stop taking responsibility for absolutely everything that doesn't go as desired in this world!
- Drink more water.
- Eat fewer cookies.
- Spend more time outside.
- Make a new friend.
- Watch classic movies that those film studies kids know about but we production kids didn't necessarily watch and study in film school.
- Read more screenplays.
- Go swimming more often this summer.
Wow, that's quite a list, and I think if I let myself I would keep going. Well, it's a start.
I am optimistic that 2008 will be a better year for everyone. I know I'm not the only one who had troubles this past year. My prayer for 2008, modified from its original form:
"Grant us the strength to change the things we can, the serenity to accept the things we can't, and the wisdom to know the difference."
The first half of '07 was great: I was teaching 2 sections of screenwriting and getting some of my own writing done. Went on my first writing retreat in the spring and got a couple pieces done. Spent most of the summer planning for the trip to Korea for my documentary. Got in a 2nd retreat at the end of summer.
The second half of '07 was less than ideal: mom went into the hospital with renal failure, I took a job out of town that paid me in monopoly money, I went to Korea during a brutal heat wave and ended up stuck with my travel plans canceled because of circumstances beyond my control, continued to deal with mom's health issues, splashed bacon grease on my face and neck, got screwed for grant money from work, my screenwriting class canceled for next semester, and gained more weight, putting me into a size 14 jeans.
Now the good news is that the past is the past, and after this post I shall think of these things no more. The book of 2007 is about to close forever. It's time to think of the coming year, and what I want it to look like.
So, without further ado...
My Intentions for 2008, in no particular order
- Finish revising Sentinel Station
- Complete first two drafts of Beauty Is...
- Renew my free lance writing career, even if it's only publishing 1 or 2 features
- Obtain a job that pays me what I'm worth and fulfills some aspect of my potential, whether it's a full- or part-time, teaching or non-teaching position.
- Find an exercise/health routine that works for me so that I can lose 20 lbs.
- Continue practicing Dharma with a focus on being compassionate to myself as well as all other sentient beings.
- Make a schedule that enables me to keep my priorities straight, such that I'm not cleaning the house when I should be writing. This entails establishing a routine for writing that won't be usurped by mere procrastination.
- Make a trip to Massachusetts with Bizarro so that he can see parts of New England, my old stomping grounds, and meet the rest of my family.
- Stay on my budget so that I can put some money away for a rainy day.
- Stop taking responsibility for absolutely everything that doesn't go as desired in this world!
- Drink more water.
- Eat fewer cookies.
- Spend more time outside.
- Make a new friend.
- Watch classic movies that those film studies kids know about but we production kids didn't necessarily watch and study in film school.
- Read more screenplays.
- Go swimming more often this summer.
Wow, that's quite a list, and I think if I let myself I would keep going. Well, it's a start.
I am optimistic that 2008 will be a better year for everyone. I know I'm not the only one who had troubles this past year. My prayer for 2008, modified from its original form:
"Grant us the strength to change the things we can, the serenity to accept the things we can't, and the wisdom to know the difference."
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